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i hate posers.... I HATE POSERZZZZZZ
DO YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT TYPE OF GOTH YOU ARE??? WELL...HERE YA GO ><(YES THEASE ARE ALL REALL GOTH TYPES)
Punkgoth
The original ******** off and die (reading Baudelaire in a coffeehaus)
Perkygoth
Would rather live with flopsey and bouncy than mopey
Poseygoth
The offshoot of the partime punk
Bittergoth
One level below mopeygoth
Crankygoth
Primarily focused in female goths once per month
Perkygoth Supreme
Edvamp _used_ to be one
Poseurgoth/Visigoth/Miligoth
…If you have to ask…
Vampygoth
Subscribes to alt.gothic and alt.vampyres
Crustygoth
Those over 40, if they still have hippy tendencies
Mustygoth
Those who have been dead a short while
Dustygoth
Those who have been dead a very long time
Industragoth
Likes both goth and industrial music
Perkydomgoth
A happy dominatrix
Perkysubgoth
Happy that _they’re_ not in control
Perkyswitchgoth
Just happy, no matter who is in control
Mommygoth/Daddygoth
Reserved for those with offspring
Polygoth
Those with polygamous preferences/desires
Bubblegoth
Those who chew gum and blow bubbles at clubs
Kittygoth
Those who own Hello Kitty _everything_
Keropigoth
Those who own Keropi _everything_
Badtzgoth
Those who own Badtz Maru _everything_
Burritogoth
Those who have experienced Tortillas
Androgagoth
Those who have perfected that androgynous look
Crowgoth
Those who think they are Brandon Lee
Monogoth
Monogamous relationships only!
Fuzzygoth
Those with facial hair or _very_ hairy backs
Arachnogoth
Those that have a spider fetish and/or own tarantulas
Necrogoth
Those obsessed with death, or sex with the dead
Ultragoth
They know who they are, and we could care less
UltraMegagoth
Those born on Halloween or Friday the 13th
Lumigoth
If it glows in the dark, they own it
Manlygoth
Reserved especially for Al Golagia and other “men”
Geekygoth
Those who have achieved the delicate balance of geekdom and gothdom
Oi!goth
Often combined with punkgoth (don’t fight with these ones)
Aussiegoth/Austragoth
Our friends from down under
Manicgoth
Manic depressive
Nerdigoth
Those that try to be geekygoth, but don’t quite pull it off
Fingoth
Reserved exclusively for Desmodus
Fossilgoth
Those born 100+ years too early
Neurogoth
Cyber freak
Newrogoth
New romantics
Sistergoth
Devote followers of the Sisters of Mercy
Studygoth
Those enrolled at a form of higher/continued education
Taxigoth
Those who possess full-time jobs and help feed Uncle Sam
Spraygoth
One who fells the need to spray alt.gothic periodically
Flamegoth
One who enjoys the art of flaming
Inkygoth
Those with 2+ tattoos
Blinkygoth
Own those blinking red eyed bat keychains
Pezgoth
Own _both_ the skeleton and witch Pez(tm) dispensor
Purrygoth
Those who like cats more than people
Newbiegoth
Just goth the courage to begin posting and/or clubbing
Anarchigoth
Anarchists
Miligoth
Military goth
Belagoth
Those who aspire to Lugosi’s attributes
Panicgoth
Regular consumers of Manic Panic(tm) products
Fangygoth
Those with professional fangs made
Bondagoth
Enjoys bondage (giving or receiving)
Bigoth
Bi-sexual goth
Lesbigoth
Lesbian goth
Homogoth
Gay goth
Boxgoth
Own one or more lunchboxes to carry personal effects
Petalgoth
Obsessed with drying roses, black roses, or eating roses
Babygoth/Childgoth
Offspring of goths
Fairygoth
Those that are godmother/mother to #64
Gangstagoth
Boiz/grlz chillin in da hood
Noodlegoth
Those on the ramen/maccaroni/spaghetti/pasta budget
Fishygoth
Wear fishnet on _any_ part of their body
Aquagoth
Their only nourishment is in the form of liquids
Alcigoth
Alcoholic goth
Vegigoth
Vegetarian or vegan goth
Orthogoth
Wear braces, retainers, ect…
LittleMinigoth/stumpygoth
Those under 5’1”
Shygoth
Prone to staring and hiding behind/under people/things at clubs
Murkeygoth
Goes mopey/perky/mopey/perky (repeat), similar to manicgoth
Spineygoth
Has hedgehogs in their sig or porcupine/hedgehog fetish
Quantumgoth
Ask Sexbat ^..^ ,he will tell you
Semigoth
Haven’t committed 100% to gothdom (part-time goth)
Redgoth
Community over ego goth, AKA commiegoth
Stonergoth
Ingests/grows/produces illegal substances for the mind/body
Litigoth
Nightmare lawyers
Gungoth
Watch out for them and their alt.gothic.guns.guns.guns!!!
Crimpygoth
Crimped hair nightmare
Spikeygoth
Spiked hair, spiked jacket, and/or spiked collar
Chiroptogoth
Bat lovers or anything to do with bats
Netgoth
Isn’t everyone who reads this?
Jellogoth
Serves oh-so-difficult custom creations to honored guests
Metagoth
Sorry, lost the definition… (help?)
Betagoth
Still trying to get out of test mode for final release
Wankergoth
Thinks they are the 1st to denounce goth this/that
Barbigoth
Collects Barbies & dresses them up like goths (Ken/Skipper too)
Duckiegoth
Brings a rubber duckie to clubs and shows
Miscgoth/Calicogoth/Muttgoth
A miscellaneous smattering of all types
Comigoth
Reads/collects comic books
Sandygoth
Obsessed with Sandman or loves the beach
Winniegoth
Winnie the Pooh/A.A. Milne fans. say “Oh Bother!” a lot
Swampgoth
Into Swamp subgenres (Nick Cave, Cramps, ect…)
Behemothgoth
600+ pounds goth
Oldschoolgoth
Don’t like anything after Bauhaus broke up
Newschoolgoth
Don’t like anything before Bauhaus broke up
Amerigoth
Into only USA goth bands, or are from the USA
Britgoth
Into only UK goth bands, or are from the UK
Slothgoth
Veeerrryyy veeerrryyy sllloooww goth
Brothgoth
Like soup or can only afford a soup diet
Moshgoth
Those into pits (willingly that is)
Pogogoth
Jump up and down, don’t mosh (usually a perkygoth as well)
Robogoth/Bionicgoth
Those who are androids or have false limbs
Dixiegoth
From the south… y’all
Yankeegoth
From the north… yous guys
Weekendgoth
Goth on weekends only
Coughgoth
Goffs wif a cold *sniff*
Ditzygoth
Dumb goths
Htoggoth
Dyslexic goths (also palindromic goths)
Mothgoth
Goths after the larvel stage
Archigoth
One who archives alt.gothic articles, ect…
Billygoth
One who likes rockabilly
Ambigoth
Thinks that Brian Eno’s _Discreet_Music_ is too noisy and agitated, usually a lover of 4AD/Projekt bands
Canagoth
From the Big Maple Leaf place
Cyclogoth
Lover of moterbike/bicycles/unicycles
Whitbygoth
Ask Jane Shaw, she’ll tell you!
Topgoth
Whitby Gothic Festival badge wearer and damn proud!
Holygoth
Devout religious goths
Pagangoth
Followers of their own religion, or lack thereof
Grumpygoth
Is related to Sneezy, Happy, Sleepy, ect…
Docgoth
Devout wearer of Doc Martens (any kind)
Armagoth
Has purchased records at Armageddon, or loves armadillos
Texgoth
Duh! they’re from Texas
Notagoth
One who insists on claiming that they’re “not a goth!”
Negativegoth
Wearer of white garb
Modgoth
Goths with scooters (old European ones, not Hondas)
Converjagoth
Has/will atten/ed a/an Convergence
Frothgoth
Infuriated flamer who falls for every troll on alt.gothic
Crunchygoth
Maitians a bat house, grows own wormood, brings spiders into house
Juvigoth
Thoose under the tender age of 18, but older than 12
Glittergoth
Puts glitter _everywhere_! especially body, usually also Perkygoth
Nephgoth
Those who think Fields of the Nephilium are the definitive gothic band
Sologoth
Goths living in un-gothic places looking for a scene to inhabit
Ophidigoth
Ones fond of, in possesion of, with the name of a legless reptile
Chaosgoth
Thrive of causing and/or being in chaotic/stressful/hectic environments (can also be a fractal freak)
Pyrogoth
Fire! fire!
Peppygoth
Has lifetime perscription of Prozac (drug induced Perkygoth)
Maudlingoth
Wishes had a lifetime percription to Prozac
Theragoth
Dependant/functional upon therapy or forced into therapy without warning
Cybergoth
Technically advanced
Sedagoth
Must be/enjoys being repressed/restrained through chemical methods
RenFairgoths
Those determined to wear marginally historical clothes from the 16th-18th centuries, including chain mail, soft leather boots, and/or wunder-Corsets. Usually they are also a…
Celtogoth
Obsessed with the wailing female voices, harps and all thing Irish, including Harp ale. Especially into matriarchal Celtic mysticism a la Robert Graves, as well as Irish poets. Often in the same circles with…
Gypsygoth
Tons of dangly jewelry, often some of it crossing the cheek or forehead under a tassled wrapped scarf. Conduct seances to old Dead Can Dance albums.
MerchantIvorygoth
Of the dandy variety, inspired 19th-century achingly romantic drmas by the film company Merchant Ivory (often staring Julian Sands and what’s-her-name from Room With a View)
ClubKidgoth
Wear the same shiney, glittery platforms to raves and goth clubs
Promgoth
Dyed thier prom dress/suit black or attended 3+ proms
NewWavegoth
Fierce, pre-categorized goth/new-wave/punky look a la Anne Magnuen in The Hunger
Instagoth
One day they aren’t, the next they are (similar to posergoth)
MyLittlePonygoth
Thoose with multi-color hair extensions
CromeDomegoth/Baldigoth/Curlygoth
Those without hair, intensionally or otherwise
Grungigoth
Black plaid and Kurt Cobain, need it be defined more?
Ravengoth
Common affliction among NetGoths who have ‘Raven’ in their handle
Quartzgoth
Into crystal/mineral energy, often found wearing small quartz necklaces
LARPgoth
Mistaken for a Goth as they Live Action Role Play, often have Belagoth syndrome
Germanogoth
Jackboot wearer & knows how to use them; can be depressed in 2 languages
Ratgoth
Possesses 3+ of the species Rattus Norvegicus/Rattus Rattus, often used as fashion aides
Disneygoth
Collector of disneyware, wears black gloves & Mickey Mouse ears to clubs
Godzillagoth
Lover of large paper mache monsters (et. al. in cheesey horror movies)
Bridalgoth
Those who take thrift store wedding dresses, “make them goth” & wear them to clubs
Chigoth
Those living in the general Chicagoland area (includes IN and WI areas)
Labelgoth
Wear only the newest in goth fashion from label such as Begotten, Lip Service, Cyxtees, Eternal, Fun House, ect…
Depechegoth
Own every single DepecheMODE album and single, for more info ask DJ Phoenix.
Casualgoth
Always wearing all black, but never look completely ready to go out.
Curegoth
Do _not_ believe Robert Smith when he says that the cure isn’t Goth.
Colorgoth
Wear color, such as burgundy, purple, red and/or blue, more often than the typical all black attire
Morrisseygoth
“I wear black on the outside, ‘cause black is how I feel on then inside.” often also Vegigoths, Mopeygoth and Bigoth or Homogoth
Valleygoth
“Like, oh my goth”
Siouxsiegoth
Jeeper creepers, where’d you get those peepers
Covergoth
One who feels they cannot go out in public unless their face is completely covered in Black and/or White grease paint.. (sometimes resembling a scary circus clown, also connected to “Instagoths”)
Transgoth
Goths who crossdress into anothers gender.
Campingoth
Goths that go camping. If you don’t believe me, go to M’era Luna
Shoggoth
Someone far more into the horrific/slime/tentacles aspect than the erotic/vampire/fetish-y stuff.
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