Journey: Love, Hatred, and Lonliness

I couldn't stop feeling the way I did. I couldn't help feeling so much emotion and not knowing what it meant. Loving someone made me feel this way. I had many thoughts going through my head that day we were together. That was the day I felt whole. I felt like no one could take me away from him, that no one could make me feel the way I felt with him. His breath, I could taste. His heart, I could hear. His smile, I could see. His warmth, I could feel. But it left me. All the feelings drained, pulled from me, by only simple words like "I don't want you to love someone like me." I told him I could wait...I would wait forever if I had to. I wanted him to see that nothing was gonna change my love. My heart, my mind, my body...I left it all for him. I left it all for someone who didn't even try to love me back. And I knew he wouldn't try...even though he said he wanted to. What could I do? What could I do to make someone understand all the emotion that I felt when I was with him? How could he understand that the love I had for him ran deeper than any ocean or sea? I guess I'll never know. I'll never be able to have him see the true me.

How can anyone describe love? Is it a feeling, a touch, a taste, a useless emotion? Will anyone ever be able to define true love? I knew from the moment he had kissed me...that I had found the one I loved. The only one who would be able to recieve all of my love. The only one to deserve my love. And I felt it whenever I thought of him. I tasted it everytime we kissed. I craved it, everytime he was away from me. It was love...and he pushed it away. He felt he didn't deserve my love. I wanted to give him my love...and I did. Only to be pushed away. My heart...feels it can't take anymore pain...but I know...that it was meant to happen.

I said things I shouldn't have. I told him to go away. I told him that he was an a*****e...that I was an idiot for loving him. But was it a mistake?

(to be continued)