odd jokes
there were three kids named shut up,poop, and manners. poop broke his leg and shut up went to call 911... when the police arrived, they asked shut up for his name. shut up said"shut up" then the policeman said "where is your manners?"shut up said"hes over there, picking up poop"
wierd inventions
a parachute that opens on impact
a helicopter with an ejector seat
see-through bathroom curtains
a water-proof teabag
riddles
Q:why did the man put a ruler on the newspaper?
A:he wanted to get the story straight
Q:can a match box?
A:no, but a tin can
Q:what happened to the horse that swallowed a dollar?
A:he bucked
brainstorms(may not be funny)
Q:three men were capsized in a boat. it capsized,but only two got their hair wet.why?A:the third man was bald
Q:a man walks into a bar(ouch) and asks for a glass of water. the bartender gives him the water and imedietely points a pistol at him, and puts it back without firing it, why?
A:the customer had the hick-ups
Q:a couple goes into a resturant, and both drink a glass of water with ice. the man drinks it fast and the woman drinks it slowly.out of nowhere, the lady dies.Why?
A:there was poison in the ice and since the lady drank it slowly, and let the poison set in the water
MORE TO COME SOON!