A black eye...bruising...stitches in my eyebrow. All cause somebody took a swing and hit me as I was walking away from an erupting fight. Spent most of the night in the ER...one thought was standing out, the whole time: It's gonna be hard to enjoy looking at myself for awhile. Anybody and everybody who really knows me, knows how serious that statement is. I feel like on the outside, I'm not the same Me anymore, as I look at myself this way. One eye barely open, surgical thread holding my right brow together just to stop the bleeding...the gnarly black eye I was left with. This entire moment, dare I say, broke me. The looks that it had taken years of growing into, along with years of the one I love telling me how handsome I am and bragging about me...gone as fast as a breeze on a summer shoreline. For as long as it takes this to heal, I'm not going to be able to like myself as much as I usually do. It isn't fair to me, to have something I'm proud of, taken away so fast and without warning. But I guess that's life...I'm tired now. Might just go in my room and read, where I don't have to be seen.
Arashi Yanagawa · Tue Jul 08, 2008 @ 06:13pm · 0 Comments |