Friendly Fire
These are funny, but karma being the b***h that she is, my activities eventually caught up with me.
The summer before I started law school, I was seeing a girl in Miami named "Courtney."
She was incredibly hot--one of those girls you have a physical reaction too as soon as you see her.
One time we were ******** doggy style, incredible sex, and right as I was about to come I pulled back too far and my d**k came out. I didn't realize it, and as I thrust forward again, instead of going back into her v****a my d**k stuck in her a** crack (NOT into her a*****e, but her crack, between her butt cheeks, like a hot dog...sort of).
I was leaning over her, my face right above the back of her head, and I looked down at my d**k right as I hit climax...and shot nut INTO MY OWN EYE.
A direct hit, right into my wide-open eye. I didn't even see it coming...literally.
Almost immediately, I developed a personal appreciation for how much come stings. That s**t BURNED. It took me a minute to wash it out, but the sting, and the redness, stayed for a good 4 or 5 hours.
******** you karma.
-Tucker Max
Random song from The Sound of Music:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GUFW7HW8_rQ&feature=related
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