Okay, since I have two main computers and the word documents don't transfer, I'll be writing Tessa's story here. Since I don't have much time right now, I'll keep something of a record of her exploits so I don't forget. wink
1: Saw how many individual pieces you can rip up from the closest piece of paper.
Repeated the previous activity until she had enough paper to make a small hill of paper to hide in. Hid until someone comes along, jumped out and scared them enough to give them proper bowel exercise.
Tried to sing songs backwards, while they were playing front wards.
Built her own wide-area laser.
Built her own nuclear device.
Detonated her nuclear device at a football game.
Caught a bus. Literally.
Created approximately 20 realistic aliases. Used them for evil purposes.
Walked along any street and got every fourteenth person and hugged them like they were her bestest friend. Continued along the street and kept doing this until she was finally arrested.
Experimented with: pure sodium, liquid nitrogen, nitroglycerine, and as many acids as she could. Tested it on the local baseball field, having been banned from the football field.
Set up a Net Camera her friend's bathroom.
Did as much chaos up and down her street in her neighbour's car. Did doughnuts, burn-outs, fishies or anything else that seemed cool. Set up a ramp to see how many of the neighbourhood's cars/kids/houses she could jump over.
Spread vicious rumours. Set up a computer program to make them up and post them every so often to the appropriate newsgroups.
Read The Lord of The Rings out aloud in public. Backwards.
Went on a trip around every shopping centre she knew, and sampled everything she could. Ate things from the shelves and then put them back. "Accidentally" knocked over a shelf. Or five. Set up a little fort of potatoes and launched fruit and vegetables at shoppers. Tried to incite a food fight. Took about 50 items to the "8 items or less" lane. Then wandered off to get something "she forgot" and went home.
Went to her local university and pretended she was a great scientist. Got really angry when they said they didn't know she was coming. Persuaded them to allow her to put on a lecture. Taught them a "new" idea in physics that "worked", no matter what everything else said ("Now, there's only 3 types of atoms. This one's called Torrazerogoid. This one is Glitter. And this one is called Shiny. Forget your periodic table people, unless you want to be left behind." wink By the time she left, she had every last one of them firmly convinced she was right. To this day, five of them still believe 'Professor Clarissa Heart' is the only person who knows anything about science.
Tried to get a bus on top of a skycraper.
Force-fed boiled cabbage to a rude ten-year-old.
Hijacked her teacher's new very expensive car and drove it through the school.
 Irritating Pixie · Tue May 26, 2009 @ 04:39am · 0 Comments |
