Today, I just realized something about myself. I consider myself upbeat and happy-go-lucky, and other people say that I am extremely so. But despite my cheery personality, my favorite styles in fashion are among the punks and goths. I am an aspiring author, and I have pretty much decided to kill one of my story's two protagonists, and have it be the direct fault of a mistake on the other protagonist's part, and I feel no sorrow for doing it. I also find myself listening to the most depressing of music. One of my favorite albums is by Sixx AM (I'm actually listening to them right now, as I write this), called The Heroin Diaries, and most of the songs are about death, hate, depression, and committing suicide (how... cheery).
Now don't get me wrong here. I love my life, and I have full intent on living it for quite a long time to come. I'm just... bewildered about the fact that I have such a bouncy personality while I find satisfaction in such morbid things at the same time. Maybe I'm trying to balance out my happy lifestyle by surrounding myself in other people's misery. I don't know.
This has been on my mind for a while now, so I'll probably be doing some serious soul-searching until I can find an answer to this burning question in my mind.
OnyxAlchemyst · Thu Oct 01, 2009 @ 01:18am · 0 Comments |