I'm sorry.......
I'm sorry......
"-I'm sorry.
-What are you sorry for?
-...."
Time is wasted on regret...and if this is my principle, if I truly do not regret any of my past actions, then why do I feel the need to say sorry over and over....
There is no point in looking back on hindsight and analyzing every little thing that was said or done. Even if one could change the past, why would you? There must have been a reason for whatever actions. And if we constantly changed every little detail we didn't like, we would become so lost in those different paths that it would be hard to say who we really are anymore. The past, no matter how painful, still leads somewhere. Are we not all the stronger for it?
Still....I hear those words forming in my head, and I find myself uttering them even in a barely audible whisper to myself. I don't know what I'm sorry for; nothing, everything....
It lends me some comfort when I shouldn't need any.
I hang up the phone and my face is so hot and I can feel beads of sweat rolling off me... "I'm sorry."
I daydream about times standing up in front of a classroom of people and remembering words I'd wish I hadn't said..."I'm sorry."
I passed my driver's so what does it matter the mistakes I made?..."I'm sorry."
The word 'sorry' when used in this way cannot hold much meaning, but its still there...not even a word anymore but the shadow of a word, something only vaguely real as if in some dream.
I do not regret the choices I have made in my life. Yet those words continue to haunt me. What am I sorry for?
archresskagome Community Member 
|
|
