I went with Sora to the Apollo gym to see if we could catch Repliku so I could apologize to him and maybe get invited to the party again.
Well.. he was there. But by the time we got there he was getting ready to leave. The only way I was able to get a chance to talk to him was by going into the unisex sauna...
Gawd that made it sooo awkward. I really wish we could have talked while we were fully clothed and not hot and sweaty. I couldn't even look at him while we were talking. But I swear he was watching me like a hawk to see if I was going to try anything or something.
For a change I was glad to be so small. The towel covered me more than it would have another girl. I swear I just wanted to HIDE in it. >_>;
Anyway... I didn't get to apologize. Instead I kind of made small talk so it would look like my being there was a coincidence.
Then he made me his date to the party.
...Very. Weird. I wasn't expecting it in the least.
I really think he was using me as a meatshield to keep his groupies at bay and leave him alone. Then again I can't be sure. He did buy me two alcoholic drinks and... stuff.
Well I didn't get drunk off them, but thy did help loosen me up. Got to see Axel go tranny, it was freaking hilarious. I had alot of fun dancing with Minxy, too. There was a sort of tie between us for Sexiest at first, but the crowd voted Minxy sexiest in the end. Even though I was totally strutting my stuff and singing to the music. ;p
Really I'm glad it was Minxy who won that. She needs the self esteem boost, otherwise she's going to keep thinking I'm stealing away her crushes when I'm totally not. I'd probably just get embarrassed again.
I was supposed to go see Repliku in the VIP room an hour after he bought me the drinks, but I was having such fun with Minxy that I totally forgot. And then it got to be hours later and ... well something bad happened. As it seems to becomming business as usual.
Repliku took Namine away to make her kill him, I think, and then Kairi and Roxas went up... I followed them and all of a sudden the guys were fighting. I did what I could to stop it, but in the end Repliku tried to kill himself. We managed to save him, but things are just.. awful now. I feel horrible for Roxas, Kairi, and Namine. They're really suffering from this. And I know almost nothing about the whole thing.
At the same time... I can't help but feel partly responsible. I should have just gone up to meet him like he wanted. I shouldn't have forgotten. Maybe if I hadn't, then this wouldn't have happened.
People might say that it's not my fault, but I can help the knots forming on my insides. He nearly died. What if I had never shown at all? What would have happened then? I don't know.
I'm going to try talking to him. I'm going to apologize... and I'm going to try to be his friend. So that he doesn't have to feel like killing himself again.
I wish my mom were still around. She'd know just what to do.
...I think I'll cuddle with Aerith tonight. She kind of feels like a mom or a big sister for me. I could use that about now.
a petite ninja · Sat Dec 09, 2006 @ 08:17am · 1 Comments |