Sis Lina, wherever you are, I apologize for logging in without your permission. I know you trust me, though. Otherwise, you wouldn't have let me know your password. You see, I had to log in and allow comments, because, I'm gonna fix something for you. Yesterday, when looking at the screenshots of some of your PMs and reading them, I noticed something. Apparently, you had to post one of your PMs in parts, and in the process, you didn't notice that you weren't copying the entire text. Now I'll share that missing part in your place. So, wherever you are, be happy... Farewell... If you're gone, rest in peace...
(2nd PM)
''Depression Fairy... A realistic girl, who's into fairytales! LOL. She was a lot like me, that's for sure. Because she lived in a small town, near the border of Mexico, one of her biggest wishes was to live somewhere rainy. I was able to saw myself in her, because, even while insulting someone, she would act like a big sister. A really caring person... She was aware of the fact that we are all one. Thanks to my freakish side, I bade her an early farewell... I'm really sorry; but I'll never forget her... I can't, anyway. She really was a lot like me.
Infinite Strife... Oh, he wouldn't call me a ''friend'', and I can't blame him. Unlike me, he wasn't very talkative. That's why I misunderstood him. Also, I still wasn't used to this terrible life of mine back then. I think I kind of took my anger out on him... He was a naturally kind, and respectful person. Sure, he looked like a jerk, but if he really is a jerk, then I don't know who isn't. He wasn't as emotionally expressive as a girl, that's all. But, one thing's for sure: He was a lot more kind and considerate than most guys. I bullied him, and I'm really sorry...
Mana-san... He was actually a friend of one of my friends (Josh), and even though I always wanted to get closer to him, I couldn't, for I wasn't able to stop being silly. Mana-san's soul is a girl, who's a dreamer, just like me! And her favorite game was Persona 3! That game is one of my favorites as well! She was a wonderful person. Way too nice for Josh! Muahaha! Just kidding. LOL. She was a clever, natural, understanding, considerate, and caring person.''
I quit. This time, permanently. I don't have a choice, and everyone's gone anyway... I'm really sad, and I want to ''say'' something, but I can't... So I'll just share four of my PMs that were sent to a wonderful person, who's a really sweet, kind, and amazing friend... Now, about the PMs... The first one tells about me, I guess, and the second one is for my friends... The third one... it... tells about the ''real'' me, I guess... And the last one... whatever... Everything ends... and I'm fawking sad... Goodbye Gaia...
1st PM
Why, of course you can dominate someone regardless of your sexual state. It goes without saying. It's not like he was an idiot. He was just complaining, you know. I mean, admitting that you're a virgin must be kind of hard, considering that we live in a world where everyone brags about having sex. I'm a proud virgin, though. Well, even though he was complaining, I think he, too, was a proud virgin. I know that he didn't wanna sleep with the first skirt-wearer he'd met. At least, he wasn't a filthy cyberer like you! Haha!
And... a guy wanted to pay you gold for cyber?! *Starts crying in jealousy* Waaaaah!!! That never happened to me!!! And I thought I was such a fashionable person! No! I know! It's because I always look like a queen, but you look so cheap! Yeah! You cheap secs object, you! LOL.
Aaww... I don't know how I'm still able to laugh. I feel terrible inside... Fawk... Oh well... LOL. I have many secrets indeed. I feel miserable, I wanna go after Olivia, Steve, and countless others. Each one of them was unique. This world is empty without them. I can't tell you how horrible I feel, yet I'm always ready to make a joke and laugh like an idiot. Because, I'm actually a very happy person, but a prisoner of this nightmare I call ''my life''. And I know that I sound like a weakling, but I've done everything I could... All I needed was a family, friends, love... Unfair... But I'm sorry, I don't have a right to make you upset. I don't know why I'm telling all this.
Anyway... Can I be even more selfish by asking for your heart's support? I'll go through a great hardship in December. I never hesitated to take action, no matter how scared I was. And there was almost never a single person to feel safe, so I guess I'm just sick and tired of trying to be strong. But, I know that a heart is able to support another, so please... wish me luck... I'm gonna need it so bad...
Wow, I remember my first day on Gaia. It was interesting... I got my first account back in 2006, lost my password after some time, and got this account in 2008... Never paid for Gaia-Cash, never got anyone donate, still made millions. I was such a businesswoman. LOL. I was very popular for a while, and made lots of friends, but only a few of them were truly ''awake''. And I will never forget them... Hey, can I talk about them? LOL. I guess I will anyway...
Let's see... I remember Sammy, an emo girl from Pennsylvania. Most people were thinking of her as a cold, cruel bish, who enjoyed cutting herself, but not for a second did I think that. She was actually really emotional, and very moralistic. I don't think she was aware of her willingness to do the right thing. She was a sad, yet funny person, who loved animals. I mean, she IS! It's not like she's dead... I hope... She was really nice...
And then, there was Diane. She was 5X when I met her. Yep! But she was an awesome ZOMG player, really ferocious and energetic! LOL. Her soul was really young, but even though she was such a living-bomb, she had the maturity. She had lots of problems underneath, but was still cheerful. She was very understanding, and really sweet...
Bored? Please don't be! LOL.
I remember Frank, your typical bad-boy... or so he thought. LOL. He had such poor health, and was so stupid for not being able to stay away from trouble. That moron. He was really considerate of others, really friendly, really sweet. No matter what happened, he always loved making jokes. He was a really caring person... and very sincere...
Jennifer... When I met her, she was 3X. She had her kids around, and they, too, were Gaians! Jen was desperately looking for a husband, but she wasn't a flirty person at all. I think, at first, she may seem like a cold, emotionless, tough, intimidating person to other people, but I never got that irritating feeling... She was an incredibly loyal friend, and a really protective person... Behind her dark mask, she was shockingly sweet and caring... She was a nice mom...
Chris... from England... LOL. He was so silly and fun! And it was so easy to talk to him. Not even once did he make me feel uncomfortable around him. I don't think he knows what being shy means. He would always talk to me, and was always so lovely. He was like a little brother to me... At first, he was kinda flirty, but when he met a serious girl, he was incredible. That funny, kind of superficial boy was super-loyal... He had a cute kitty, too! And he was one of those never-arrogant people. He was really modest, and so sweet...
Bailey... A very sweet girl, who has a very strict, darn father! That poor girl was really hesitant about lots of things, thanks to that annoying father. I don't think she was aware of it, though. Never really talked about her father... She wasn't ''free'' at all; but even with so much pressure, she was an actively helpful person. She always appreciated niceness, and was really humble and sweet... I was kind of her role-model. See? I told you she was humble. Poor girl, she needs a better role-model. LOL.
Aaron... An Asian boy, who's gay and really lonely... He enjoyed fashion, celebrity pics, pop music, literature... Superficial? Not at all... He was a very understanding, kind, and caring person, who knew how to appreciate... He knew how to be happy with what he had... No matter what happened, he was always grateful... He was really sweet, deep, mature and loyal...
Gregory... Incredible... He was never able to forget his first love. So incredibly loyal. I admire him... And he was such an anti-@sshole. LOL. Meaning; not rude, not cocky, not perverted, not ignorant, not superficial... Turn into a girl and marry with him. He is the perfect husband. LOL. He was always so calm and sensible. I loved making him laugh, and it was really fun to tease him. LOL. He was very mature and sweet...
Love-chan! LOL. She's been traveling all around the world, and I forgot to ask her name, like, every single time we met! LOL. She was actually from Malaysia, and I think she was 13 or something! LOL. She was so cute and funny... Religious, hidebound, ditzy, sweet, and always ready to preach! LOL. She was scared of perverts, but still would tell any jerk to be nice. Really brave and cute...
Josh... Bi, perverted, shallow, and a liar... LOL. But, he had a blunt side, and was really fun. Even though he was kind of a superficial person, who seemed really unserious, he wasn't exactly a laugh-off. He was caring in his own way, and he loved making jokes. He was really sweet and friendly...
Matthias... He's the only friend of mine who's still on Gaia ATM... What? You? Shush. We aren't talking about you, are we? LOL. Anyway, I love him. He's hot-headed, funny, and so sweet... He's gay, and he thinks he has no emotions. LOL. Silly... He's very emotional, really caring, and very loyal. He's into femboys, but he's not a pervert at all. LOL. I love making fun of him, he easily gets mad! LOL. He's so cute.
Steve... Never had enough time, but... I do know him well, because he was a lot like me... Loved getting the best grades, was ready to show everyone who's the best! LOL. But was always fully aware of its meaninglessness... In other words, he actually had a modest heart... A total hypocrite, and once again, a full awareness! LOL. In other words, he was just making fun of life. I understand it so well... He was incredibly honest with himself, that sly fox. LOL. I always half-jokingly act like a jerk, because it's a great way to make fun of life, stay light-hearted, and show people that being a jerk is truly LAME! Steve was like that. I was able to see it so easily. After all, I, myself, am like that! Steve was smart, funny, sweet, warm, and really caring in a way that wasn't flamboyant. In other words, he was really nice, but not a show-off... He didn't like being called ''Steven''. LOL. Stevennnn... He doesn't even remember me, I know. LOL. And that makes me a little miserable, but it's okay... I love him...
My friends... I will never ever forget them... I was so freaking lucky that I met them... They're so wonderful, each one of them... And thank YOU so much for reading this silly thing, and for everything. You're an amazing person, and I will never ever forget you... I love you...
You... Just why the hell are you doing this? Just let me be. I'll be gone, you'll never hear from me again. I'm just a beloved ''internet friend'', am I not? I know that you care about your friends, but... I don't think I'm normal, and I can't blame myself for that anymore... Because, this is... truly incredible... unbearable... There were lots of people who said ''you're the most patient person I've ever met.''... But not even one of them knew a sh*t... This is unbearable dammit... I'm not a robot... This is incredible... I wanna explode and destroy the whole universe... I wanna explode, because there's no way I can describe what I've been through... Too much, too big, too terrible, too disgusting to express... If I were God, I would NEVER EVER allow this sh*t. I don't care about ''tests'', I don't care about that sh*t. This is so ridiculous. Countless nice people are wishing to die, and countless disgusting people are laughing their @ss off. This is so incredibly ridiculous. WTF? Tests? WTF, truly? I want JUSTICE, I want someone to watch over us! But there's nobody... I don't believe in a ''sitting'' god... There's clearly nobody... I can't describe how I feel... Countless sh*ts happened, I destroyed my own @ss trying to hang on, but I'm sorry, I'm not a f*cking ROBOT... I'm so incredibly sick and tired, yet there's still nobody... Nobody is watching over us... That's terrible... Do you still believe in a god? I did my f*cking best, I destroyed my own @ss, if ''he'' exists, then WTF is that f*cking god expecting from me? I can't fool myself anymore, there's no god... and I HATE THIS! I WANT SOMEONE TO WATCH OVER US! WE'RE NOT INVINCIBLE, WE NEED HELP! THERE ARE SOME UNLUCKY PEOPLE AMONG US! THEY NEED HELP! F*CKING HELP! I NEED IT, TOO! I NEED A MIRACLE...
There, happy now? This is the real me... Why did you have to be so kind? I'm ashamed, but this is the real me... I don't wanna do this anymore... And you don't have to say something, you know? What can you say anyway? Just let me be, don't care... And you know what? I wasn't lying, I used to be an incredibly positive, hopeful, naive, happy, happy, happy, happy, f*cking HAPPY person... And now... I'm this ''thing''... This is my happy ending... If there were a god, I'd never forgive it... I'm not scared of anything, I don't care anymore... I'm sorry, I'm gonna go do something...
Just look at me. My life is sh*t. It is sh*t. It is poo. It is *censored*. It is *beep*. It is *pukes*. And... am I serious? Fawk no. Screw god. Seriously, screw god. Hey, spread your legs, god... *Fawks god*... You know what? God is tight... Seriously. I'm a serious person, after all. I screw seriously. God's been fawked, no kidding.
Godporn = Religion
Yeah, OMG, I hate you sooo much!!! And I hate ice cream, too!!! LOL. Get real. Seriously. Don't you even know that there's no way I can hate you? You're even better than ice cream, and I love ice cream more than I love my mama. Wait, I love a random cockroach more than I love my mama, actually... But I adore ice cream, and you're even more important than ice cream! Ice cream is my love, my life, my everything!! Can't you see you're loved?! Moronella. *Slaps*
Santaporn must be better than pokemonporn. Ew, pokemon... Disgusting! And can you imagine that Pikachu creature touching itself or something? Eeew!! GROSS!!! Human males touch themselves to produce milk, so I guess that Pikachu animal produces bananamilk. Next time you drink bananamilk, please remember that.
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