BEST SEX JOKE EVERZZZ!!!!!

BEST SEX JOKE!!! Body: Okay so a guy is near the end of his senior year in high school.Unfortunately,he still has to share a room with his younger brother who is only 9yearsold.One night, he decides to bring his girlfriend home for a little fun.They have bunk beds and the guy notices that his little brother is already asleep on the lower bunk, so he and his girlfriend climb up to the top bunk.As you might expect things start to heat up.The guy remembers that his little brother is sleeping below so he tells his girlfriend to whisper "lettuce" if she wants it harder and "tomato" if she wants a new position.Lettuce !Tomato !Lettuce !Tomato !Lettuce !Tomato !She screams.Lettuce !Tomato !Whoa !PULL IT OUT !PULL IT OUT NOW ! I can't get pregnant !Then the little brother shouts up, "Hey,would you guys stop making sandwiches up there! You're getting mayonnaise all over myface !"

listen 2 tha muzic bish

Unable to identify Vimeo video URL.

shane dawson's funni

xX_i ish emo jerk_xX

xX_i ish emo jerk_xX's avatar

Last Login: 06/14/2011 9:51 am

Gender: Female

Birthday: 02/02

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stuff

http://complexkids.webs.com/

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o...YAOI ROXZ


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I adopted!
Name: Inuyasha
Age:circa...100yrs
Likes:Kagome, Kikiyo, being moody, showing no emotions ect...
Dislikes: Emotions, Naraku, Koga, Being half-demon
Owner:Goddess bish
Get one now!

Picz i feel lyke addin

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About

Im GODDESS. if u ask mi name u obviously dnt read that. i lyke eh.. skateboardin, MMA, any type ov muzic, dark thingz, funny ppl, boyz, red, black, purple, white, umm..ehhhh....,vampirez, im emo (whooptededodadey), sleeping until seven in the afternoon, computerz, muzic playerz, TOKIO FREAKIN HOTEL N TOM KAULITZ N BILL KAULITZ ESPECIALLY. XP. I hate ppl controllin mi n pple tellin mi wut i should do when i dress up n givin mi suggestions on wat to do wit this n that. I lyke bein creative. im black, white, and cherokee indian bishez. ummz..hmmzz...lyke addin zz'z to everythin (apparently). Have mi own dictionary.. u wanna know sum wordz then buy it xD ..I can be a very..eh letz say abrassive but ppl luv mi n i dnt give a ******** hehe. PPL say i have a cursin problem..(nandi) n i say get tha ******** over it u've known mi all this time yet u still stay so i'm doin sumthin right so deal wit it. I'm not a convo started if i dnt know you but if u mi frnd well imma talk 4 eva but i dnt save convozso eh.. ..oh yea n i luv dyin mi hair despite tha picz mi hair iz alot ov colorz

-PEACE- thagoddezz

*****************************
I'm a liar,
because I don't tell you everything.
I'm a slut,
because I like boys.
I'm weird,
because I'm not like you.
I'm a nerd,
because I actually like reading sometimes.
I'm a fake,
because most of the time I'm happy.
I'm stupid,
because sometimes I'm wrong.
I'm a prep,
because I like looking nice.
I'm a punk
because I hate listening
I'm done,
being labeled.
put this on ur pro-file if u hate being judged!
************************************
╔═╦══╦═╗ Put this on your
║╩╣║║║║║ profile if you support
╚═╩╩╩╩═╝ Emos ♥

A REAL TOKIO HOTEL FAN:
***********************
>LOVES THE SONGS IN GERMAN AND ENGLISH
>THINKS THEY ALL ARE TOTALLY HOT!!! ^^
>THINKS DEVILISH WAS AWESOME TOO
>DOESN'T ONLY LOVE READY, SET, GO AND SCREAM
>DOESN'T ONLY LIKE TOKIO HOTEL 4 THEIR LOOKS
>KNOWS HOW TO PRONOUNCE EVERY GUY'S NAME
>CAN SING ALL THE SONGS IN GERMAN
>NEVER EVER FORGETS TOM, GEORG, AND GUSTAV!!
xxxPUT THIS ON YOUR PROFILE IF YOU ARE A REAL TH FANxxx
REAL TH fans know that there are twins in the band
REAL TH fans know how old each member is
REAL TH fans know each member's name
REAL TH fans know more than 5 songs from them
REAL TH fans have more than 10 songs on their ipod or mp3
REAL TH fans know the lyrics to more than 15 songs by memory
REAL TH fans get mad when haterz talk s**t about them
REAL TH fans have this on their channel

*****************************
YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN 2008 WHEN...
1. You go to a party sit down and take Myspace photos.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is because they don't have AIM, MSN, Facebook, or Youtube.

4. You'd rather search all around the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the T.V.

6. Your evening activity is sitting at the computer.

7. You read this and keep nodding and smiling.

8. You think about how stupid you are for reading this.

9. You were to busy to notice number 5.

10. You actually scrolled back up to check
if there was a number 5.

11. Now your laughing at your on stupidity.

12. Put this on your profile if you fell for it. You know you did. And so did I. XD

x]not all emos cut
[x]not all emos are bi/gay/lez
[x]emos dont mope around feeling sorri faw themselves
[x]emos arent bad pplz
[x]emos are only hated cuz they are different

Mi skateboard i no hot eh...

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MI TOM KAULITZ AHHH

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DUDEISH>>>T_T

Boy: I missed you at school today, why weren't you there?

Girl- Yeah, I had to go to the doctor.

Boy- Oh really? Why?

Girl- Oh nothing, annual shots, thats all.

Boy- Oh.

Girl- So what did we do in math today?

Boy- You didn't miss anything that great.......just lots of notes.

Girl- Ok, good.

Boy- Yeah

Girl- Hey, I have a question......

Boy- Ok, ask away.

Girl-........How much do you love me?

Boy- You know I love you more than anything.

Girl- Yeah.....

Boy- Why do you ask?

Girl-................>silence<..........

Boy- Is something wrong?

Girl- No, nothing at all.

Boy- Ok, good.

Girl- ..............How much do u care about me?

Boy- I would give you the world in a heartbeat if I could.

Girl- You would?

Boy- Yeah.........of course I would >sounding worried< is there something wrong?

Girl- No, everything is fine......

Boy- Are you sure?

Girl- Yeah.

Boy- Ok.......I hope so.

Girl- ..............Would you die for me?

Boy- I would take a bullet for you anyday, hunny.

Girl- Really?

Boy- Anyday. Now seriously, is there something wrong?

Girl- No, I'm fine, your fine, we're fine, everyones fine.

Boy- ............Ok. If your sure.

Girl-......................Well, I have to go. I'll see you tomorrow at school.

Boy- Alright, bye. I LOVE YOU.

Girl- Yeah, I love you to, bye.

THE NEXT DAY AT SCHOOL:

Boy- Hey, have you seen my girlfriend today?

Friend- No

Boy- Oh. Ok.

Friend- She wasn't here yesterday either.

Boy- I know, she was acting all wierd on the phone last night.

Friend- Well dude, you know how girls are sometimes.

Boy- Yeah........but not her.

Friend- I don't know what else to say, man.

Boy- Ok, well I gotta get to english, I'll see you after school.

Friend- Yeah, I gotta get to science, talk to you later.

THAT NIGHT:

-ring-
-ring-
-ring-
-ring-
Girl- Hello?

Boy- Hey.

Girl- Oh, hi.

Boy- Why weren't you at school today?

Girl- Uh.......I had another doctor appointment.

Boy- Are you sick?

Girl- ..................Um I have to go, my mom's calling on my other line.

Boy- I'll wait.

Girl- It may take a while, I'll call you later.

Boy-........Alright, I love you hunny.

very long pause<


Girl- (with tear in her eye) Look, I think we should break up.

Boy- What?

Girl- Its the best thing for us right now.

Boy- Why?

Girl- I love you.
click<


THE GIRL DOESNT COME TO SCHOOL FOR 3 MORE WEEKS, AND DOESNT ANSWER HER PHONE.

Boy- Hey dude.

Friend- Hey.

Boy- Whats up?

Friend- Nothing much. Hey have you talked to your ex lately?

Boy- No.

Friend- So you didn't hear?

Boy- Hear what?

Friend- Um, well, I don't know if I should be the one to tell you......

Boy- Dude, tell me!

Friend- Uh....call this number....433-555-3468

Boy- Ok............

BOY CALLS NUMBER AFTER SCHOOL

-ring-
-ring-
-ring-
Voice- Hello, Suppam County Hospital, this is nurse Beckam.

Boy- Uh.......I must have the wrong number, I'm looking for my friend.

Voice- What is her name, sir?
(boy gives info)

Voice- Yes, this is the right number, she is one of our patients here.

Boy- really? Why? What happened? How is she?

Voice- Her room number is ..646, in building A, suite 3.

Boy- WHAT HAPPENED?!

Voice- Please come by sir and you can see her, goodbye.

Boy- WAIT! NO!
*dial tone*

BOY GOES TO HOSPITAL, AND TO ROOM ..646, BUILDING A, SUITE 3. GIRL IS LYING IN THE HOSPITAL BED.

Boy- Oh my God! Are you ok?

Girl- ..................

Boy- Sweetie! Talk to me!

Girl- I..........

Boy- You what? YOU WHAT?

Girl- I have cancer and I'm on life support.

Boy- .....................>breaks into tears<......................

Girl- They're taking me off tonight.

Boy- Why?

Girl- I wanted to tell you but I couldn't.

Boy- Why not?

Girl- I didn't want to hurt you.

Boy- You could never hurt me sweetheart.

Girl- I just wanted to see if you felt about me as the same I felt about you.

Boy- ?

Girl- I love you more than anything, I would give you the world in a heartbeat. I would die for you and take a bullet for you.

Boy- ...........

Girl- Don't be sad, I love you, and I'll always be here with you.

Boy- Then why'd you break up with me?

Nurse- Young man, visiting hours are over.

BOY LEAVES, GIRL IS TAKEN OFF LIFE SUPPORT, AND DIES.

But what the boy didn't know is that the girl only asked him those questions so she could hear him say it one last time, and she only broke up with him because she knew she only had 3 more weeks to live, and thought it would cause him less pain and give him time to get over her before she died.

NEXT DAY

The boy is found dead with a gun in his hand..with a note in the other...
THE NOTE SAID:I told her I would take a bullet for her....just like she said she would die for me...

Comments

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xXx_Gwappa-B-Burnin-xXx Report | 06/21/2010 1:17 pm
xXx_Gwappa-B-Burnin-xXx
Hey mommy! Its Jordan. I freakin got hacked again. and i know whos been doin it, my cousin. Anyways i wuz wonderin if u could help me out by givin me gold. or clothes. like, nice clothes. I <3 you. Oh and Btw I went through a huge change!!! I look totally different now!
NYC_CHRIZ Report | 01/18/2010 4:08 pm
NYC_CHRIZ
NICE AVI
NYC_CHRIZ Report | 01/17/2010 7:36 pm
NYC_CHRIZ
YUP
NYC_CHRIZ Report | 01/17/2010 6:24 pm
NYC_CHRIZ
ITS THE ONE WEN THE BOY AND HIS GIRL HAVE SEX AND HE SAYS TELL ME TOMATO TO CHANGE POSSITION AND LETTUCE TO DO IT HARDER.AND THEN C U M COMES OUT BUT LIL BRO THINKS ITS MAYONAISE
NYC_CHRIZ Report | 01/16/2010 10:32 am
NYC_CHRIZ
NOTHIN MI MOM WAS RIGHT THERE SO .....U NO
NYC_CHRIZ Report | 01/15/2010 7:39 pm
NYC_CHRIZ
CURESES
NYC_CHRIZ Report | 01/14/2010 4:26 pm
NYC_CHRIZ
FUNNY SEX JOKE
NYC_CHRIZ Report | 01/10/2010 8:58 pm
NYC_CHRIZ
IM HIM
NYC_CHRIZ Report | 01/10/2010 11:49 am
NYC_CHRIZ
O BUT DO U MEMBER DJBRN
NYC_CHRIZ Report | 01/07/2010 12:28 pm
NYC_CHRIZ
was ur user guppe princess.cause im djbrn long time huh

ME SIGGIE

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Fred lubie lubz hish mom (by josh n tyler not anyove mi lame frndz xD )

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Brother and sista

A GIRL AND A GUY WERE SPEEDING OVER 100MPH ON A MOTORCYCLE GIRL: SLOW DOWN I'M SCARED GUY: NO THIS IS FUN GIRL: NO ITS NOT PLEASE ITS TOO SCARY GUY: THEN TELL ME YOU LOVE ME GIRL: I LOVE YOU, SLOW DOWN GUY: NOW GIVE ME A BIG HUG SHE GAVE HIM A BIG HUG GUY: CAN YOU TAKE OFF MY HELMET & PUT IT ON YOURSELF ITS BOTHERING ME. IN THE NEWSPAPER THE NEXT DAY A MOTORCYCLE HAD CRASHED INTO A BUILDING BECAUSE OF BREAK FAILURE. TWO PEOPLE WERE ON IT ONLY ONE SURVIVED. THE TRUTH WAS THAT HALFWAY DOWN THE ROAD THE GUY REALIZED THAT THE BREAKS WERE BROKE HE DIDN'T WANT THE GIRL TO KNOW. INSTEAD HE HAD HER HUG HIM AND, TOLD HIM SHE LOVED HIM ONE LAST TIME. THEN HE HAD HER PUT HIS HELMET ON SO THAT SHE WOULD LIVE EVEN IF IT MEANT THAT HE WOULD DIE.IF YOU WOULD DO THE SAME FOR THE PERSON YOU LOVE COPY THIS IN YOUR PROFILE

WHEN A BOY WANTS TO KISS YOU: NOW U OPENED IT NOW U HAVE TO REPOST THIS OR U WILL NEVER BE KISSED. WHEN A BOY WANTS TO KISS YOU: 1.THEY HOLD YOUR HAND AND PLAY WITH IT. 2.THEY STARE INTO YOUR EYES FOR A LONGTIME. 3.THEY GET CLOSE TO YOUR FACE. ?WHEN A GIRL WANTS TO KISS YOU:1. THEY STARE INTO YOUR EYES BITTING THEIR LIP. 2.THEY MIGHT WRAP THEIR ARMS AROUND YOU. 3.THEY PLAY WITH THEIR HANDS,SHIRT,PANTS,ECT. JUST WAITING FOR YOU TO MAKE THE MOVE. ######### ######### ......### ......### ......### ......### ######### ######### ###.......### ###.......### ######### ######### ###.......### ###....### ###..### ###### ###..### ###....### ###.......### ######### ######### .......### .......### ######### ######### ######### ######### ######### ###.......### ###.......### ######### ######### ###.......### ###.......### ######### ######### ###.......### ###.......### ######### ######### ###.......### ###.......### ######### ######### ######### ######### ......### ......### ......### ......### ######### ######### ### ##### ##### ### ######### ######### ### ### ### ### ######## ########

MI BROZZZ

emo doesn't mean u cut. emo doesn't mean ur gay. emo doesn't mean ur suicidal. emo is real. emo is people. emo is everything. emo is a label. emo is being free. free to be you. free to express. free to tell everyone to f*** off!! emo is just a word.-EMOS- *Are not cry babies *Do not always wear black *Can be very nice people *Don't always cut themselves *Are not always depressed *Can be happy too *Are normal people just like you (Put this on your profile if you agree with this.) Im emo so i should know if u hate me then its your own fault

MI SONZ


you say pink
▒▒▒▒
i say black
████
you say Zac Effron
▒▒▒▒
I say Tom Kaulitz
████
You say Paris Hilton
▒▒▒▒
I say wtf?
████
You say Rap
▒▒▒▒
I say Rock
████
You say Hannah Montana
▒▒▒▒
I say 3OH!3
████
you say im weird
▒▒▒▒
i say im different
████
copy this onto your page if you agree.

mi lil sis i luv her 2 death..n her bro

mi dadie

sis

The Man Rules­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­At last a guy has taken the time to write this all downFinally , the guys' side of the story.( I must admit, it's pretty good.)We always hear "the rules"From the female side.Now here are the rules from the male side.These are our rules!Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "ON PURPOSE!1. Men are NOT mind readers.1. Learn to work the toilet seat.You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.We need it up, you need it down.You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.1. Sunday sports It's like the full moonor the changing of the tides.Let it be.1. Crying is blackmail.1. Ask for what you want.Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!Strong hints do not work!Obvious hints do not work!Just say it!1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.Don't ask us1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one1. You can either ask us to do somethingOr tell us how you want it done.Not both.If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.1. If it itches, it will be scratched.We do that.1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.We know you are lying , but it is just not worth the hassle.1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as sports, hunting, boobs or beer1. You have enough clothes.1. You have too many shoes.1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!1. Thank you for reading this.Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.Pass this to as many men as you can -to give them a laugh.Pass this to as many women as you can -to give them a bigger laugh. itz fukin tru

tom fukin kaulitz......ahhh

i play alot

MI MOMMIE!!! i luv theze 2

MY FAVE PERSON on gaia

MAh bestie

REAADDDD!!!!!

READ!!!!

HOLLYWOOD UNDEAD