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Stupid-no-Jutsu : The art of being stupid.
Finally released in a totally unabridged format.


Today has to be one of those days in which I wish I was put away in a box and sent to some foreign country.

I'm rather angsty, or "emo" today. I don't know why...I just find everything to be completely mindless, stupid, and trivial. My feelings for people are welling up, boiling over and welling up again - all within hours. Even though I haven't seen one of them in a few weeks, I still feel the same way.

It feels like I am making a terrible mistake with my feelings. This time I want my friends to approve...no more disapproval. I don't know who I like more, let alone if they have any sort of feelings towards me. FRIENDSHIP even. That in itself would be wonderful. My mind is still hung up on this "mystery" person Jen is talking about. A large part of me is hoping its one of the people that I think is interesting, but with my luck its probably not one of them.

I can hope though.

I'm sick of all these stupid girlish feelings. The need to be held by someone that cares about you is too great. YOU don't NEED a boyfriend, you WANT one. I don't know if I want one...well, not right now at least.

I'm also a bit creeped out that people on myspace are telling me that I am gorgeous. I just want friends...not people trying to date me. And I don't want a bloody online relationship. I can't stand it.

I can't stand a lot of things.

I know my "Mr. Right" is out there. I just want to know how long it'll take for me to get to him. Maybe my he's not in my future, but in my past. I will never know.







User Comments: [8] [add]
Xeroxer
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commentCommented on: Thu May 05, 2005 @ 02:46am
Oh, I like this entry.

What you seem to be missing is setting your priorities staight. Or else you'll stay lost in that hole of life.

Also, you need a definition of friends. There's Acquaintences and friends. A friend for me, is someone I can trust and stays loyal to my heart. Simple, right?

Next, your emotions. I can't help you there, I consider myself having none. Well, I have no sad feelings and I can illusion myself to seem happy. Child-abuse, not good. Believe me.

Anyways, you're concentrating too much about this mystery guy, don't worry about it. It'll come when it comes. Believe me, and this is not an example of destiny. Destiny is false, so I stated in my journal.

Also, you don't need a boyfriend, true. You need someone that will take care of you. Lack of love in your family and friends as well? Just a question, don't bother answering.

Gorgeous? On myspace.com? Why don't you just not show your pictures of yourself? Solves the problem. Maybe you're in self-denial. And you like it when they say that, because it replaces the lack of care and love you want, by attention and flattery.

Sorry, I was lost in one of my life issues. Ignore that. Though, it was an hypothesis as well.

Mr. right, everyone can be Mr. right. The question is, can you adapt to this person. Once you can, you can classify him as Mr. Right. Brings back to my theory of "destined together" there's no such thing. I have a theory about destiny and all. Though, I've written enough as it is, and I'm sure you are aggrivated by my comments of exageration.

I'm sorry. Please forgive me.


commentCommented on: Thu May 05, 2005 @ 02:59am
Don't worry. You haven't crossed any lines.

Infact, you stated a lot of things I failed to mention in my entry.

I tend to overthink a lot, and think of each side of any matter. Its just too much of an effort to explain everything.



ShaIIow
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commentCommented on: Thu May 05, 2005 @ 03:04am
You just have to see things on every side and angle. 3nodding


commentCommented on: Thu May 05, 2005 @ 03:07am
I do, thats why I have feelings that always have a contradicting counterpart.

I feel one way, but I know I shouldn't get comfortable in that feeling because it can be taken away very easily. There's two sides to ever coin, and I'm paranoid as hell. xd



ShaIIow
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commentCommented on: Thu May 05, 2005 @ 04:00am
Aren't we all?


commentCommented on: Thu May 05, 2005 @ 04:04am
Yeah.

Though I have this thing of always over-thinking something. When I do this, I tend to know what is going to happen. It always worked with my ex boyfriend. I saw through is lies and facades, but I was too stupid to actually do something about it because I cared so much about him.

Eh. I'm weird.



ShaIIow
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commentCommented on: Thu May 05, 2005 @ 04:31am
Not weird, you just mixed up your emotionally attchements to your judement, you clouded your judgement.


commentCommented on: Thu May 05, 2005 @ 04:35am
That I did.

I was clouded for a long time, actually.



ShaIIow
Community Member
User Comments: [8] [add]
 
 
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