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The Hardest Day to Live Through
I've had my heart ripped out from my chest, stabbed, crushed, diced, and put into a blender. I've lost the love of my life to time. Time apart and I've never felt such agony in one moment, before. Shear agony that begins at the heart and travels to the head where thoughts of him never leave, even when I closed my eyes. I'm still in shock and can't believe I won't spend the rest of my life with him, a life we planned for a long time. It hurt so much when he told me he didn't love me like I was the most important person to him anymore. Thats what truly broke my heart, and I can't bear it. Its a weight that I can't get rid of. A weight filled with memories we've shared, smiled about. I hate that I could do nothing to stop us from breaking up. If I could do it over, I'd try so much harder. At the moment I'm trying to keep up the mask that hides the shaddow of my former self. I still love him. Why did things have to change. I wish today had never happened. I wish it were a dream. I've lost the only man I've ever loved, and I feel like whatever happiness I've ever possesed has been permently destroyed forever. cry
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