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You Know Who I Hate?
Flippin' Chester Bennington. Mr. Long-a**-Note-Holder-Vocalist-Of-Linkin-Effin'-Park. I hate him with a passion. Why do you ask? Okay get ready. 'Cause I'm about to rant up an effing storm.
One: For one thing.... WHAT HUMAN BEING CAN HOLD NOTES THAT EFFING LONG?! Does he not have lungs?! Is he an effing robot or some s**t?!?! I swear I've never heard... well, there's one but she doesn't count, one person hold a 3,000 second note. Have you?! No? Huh, what a thing in common we have. No, no! You know what? I hope that one day, he is no longer able to hold those long a** notes so I can beat. His. a**. In a note holding contest.
Two: While he can hold these long a** notes, get this. HE CAN SCREAM AT THE SAME. -clap- DAMN. -clap- TIME!!! -super clap of doom and destruction- What else can he do? FLOAT?! I'm getting real damn tired of this guy, upstaging my awesomeness. I mean sure, I may not be the awesomest person, doing the most awesomest thing, in the most awesomest place, at the most awesomest, in the most awesomest world of awesomism. Jes, I just made up a word. But come on!!! Everytime, I nail his long a** notes down, HE COMES UP WITH ANOTHER AND THAT'S SOME BULL!!!!
Three: You know what? My new goal in life, will be to... Beat. His. a**. I don't care how, don't care when, don't care where. I will beat him like an effing drum. And break into tiny little bits and pieces. Yes, yes I will. And then his career would be in my hands. But I'd prolly just throw it back I mean, I can't handle stardom yet.
Four: His awesomely cool name and awesomely hot looks put my plain Jane name and adorably cute looks to SHAME!!!! SHAME IN THE COLDEST PART OF THE SEA, NEAR A UNDERSEA VOLCANO THAT SHOOTS IT UP IN MID AIR AND ACCIDENTLY GETS SHOT BY A HUNTER LOOKING FER DUCKS IN DUCK SEASON!!! Some bull. I mean.... Not only is he in one of the most internationally successfull bands, but ooooooh no. His hot a** couldn't, he just HAAAAAD to be cute. You know what Chester? EF YOU!!!! I HATE YET ADMIRE, ADORE, MAYBE LOVE YOU AT THE SAME TIME.
Ugh. If you'll excuse me.... I'll be..... SULKING in my huge a** emo-because-Chester-is-so-much-more-better-than-I-corner. u.u -sniffle tear-
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