Well...
Life has been difficult lately. Old bad habits are coming back from the past except with minor changes. From using a knife to cut to a eraser to scar. My arm looks bad. his time around my parents actually saw m arm. Yup. Not a good thing. They are threatening to send me away to some place. Can't remember the name. Yeah. Lets see. I want to die. I don't get it. If I take 30 ibroprofen a day my liver should shut down soon then I die... right? That is what should happen, but whatever. I don't care. Life is too complicated. WAY TO COMPLICATED. Every one says they care and they will always be there for me. but they arn't there when I need them most. My perfect timing huh? bleh. I wonder what it is like when you die... I think it is like sleeping for a long time. Long, long time. sigh. Sounds nice. I just remember! I HATE WHEN PEOPLE CALL ME EMO. Gah. They just lable me right there, right in front of them. Not cool. Not cool at all man. I hate being single. I need love like everyday. Maybe that would make me feel less depressed. hm? Sounds like a good plan. But who would like me? I am like. Ugh. Just hate how I look. I try changing it. But I never look different. Yup. yup. yup. yeah. Nobody reads these things except for me huh? hah. Sad. I feel bad. I promised my fiends I wouldn't erase again. I always a failure as a friend. gah. I think I need help. Meds ,counciling, anything. I just want to live life to its fullest. Why can't I? Whats wrong with me? Is it only me? I bet there are others who are going through it too. But I donno. I haven't met them. One day maybe. Maybe, just maybe, I might ask my parents if I can go to therapy. I donno though, It cost to much. They would yell at me saying I shouldn't have started in the first place. blah. blah. blah. Jeez. I am a whiny little b***h, but thats a WHOLE different story. haha
Well yeah thats it. I would like to write more, but I feel it is better to keep most stuff to myself. I wouldn't want to be a burdin to people I barely know. Yeah.
Till next time;;;
Carl "Cuppy" Williams
Carl "Cuppy" Williams
Community Member