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I was thinking about when I did not have internet, man that was a sad cold world. Yet here I am again left in the cold by the cruel beast that we all know and love that is wildly known as "The World Wide Web" it is a gift and a curse all in one little box. A box that is over stocked, not over stocked with goodies, and sweats that your Grandma would make you as a child, or those with a even bleaker, blander and more depressing childhood the grandma that you imaged because you knew you would never have some one in your life like that kind old lady, or wishing for the kind of grandma that the neighborhood brats would have and unknowingly taunt you with with there bags of goodies, and happy story's of times they spent in parks, and what outher grand things they would do with their grandparents. Ok now that I am way off topic time to go back to topic.
Oh yes the internet a cruel mistress. Sometimes I have to listen to David Lee's advice and go ahead and jump. . . .
The internet helps in so many ways I have to admitte it has helped me through many sleepless nights, the cause of the sleepless nights, sometimes. Still something that was there for me either way. It has helped me keep in contact with people that I would of lost by now with out it. It has also helped some mighty scary people find me to. Its like a gun with the barrel on backwards, just does not quit work how it is exposit to. I seem to get upset and angry at my little black box that feeds my laptop its semi daily dose internet with its crazy magic powers, and decides to deny me of its magic more times then I feel I should have to be with out. The cursed little thing always seems to find some new way of upseting me and making me want to smash it to little bits. If I was not renting the cheep..... well if the situation was different with the little box, I would of had it done in a long time ago.
I was unable to go online yet another day and I am so angry, no warning no sign just gone faster then a giant kitty kitty bolting through the forest. What a terriable company, feeding on the need I have for the internet and all of its wonder to help fill my life with more little things to do. Then when it fells like it, it disappears on me like a cat that finally got the chance to run from the children that tie paper bags to the poor things feet.
Now I am stuck listening to my music mutt list, wondering if internet will one day just work and not become something that I need to worry about working day after day. Is that a dream to one day be realized or am I daring to fill my heart with false hope just to have it crushed, just like it has been with so many outher things, like a snail that gets crushed by a bird smashing it on a huge rock. One day the internet will not have problems I am sure it is something bound to happen at some point or another. In my life time, I sure do hope so.

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