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Wow, I need to find something to do today to make me forget about that dream about my ex-boyfriend last night. It was so surreal, I swear. The dream felt like a confirmation of our break up that happened, what--? two years ago? Christ, it doesn't seem like it was that long ago, but I suppose it was.

I was staying in a hotel that I somehow knew he was staying in as well. I think I was coming back from the pool when the dream started, because I was in a bathing suit with a big towel around me. His room was on the way to mine, and when I passed it the cleaning lady's trolly was in front of it. That made me wonder if he had checked out and my heart sank a little, because I wanted to see him. When I got back to my room, I left my door open and went straight to my cell phone to see if I still had his phone number in it. Something caught my attention behind me and when I turned around he was in the doorway with all of his bags packed. He had a really soft smile on his face and it made me a little uneasy. He was also in a suit, which would be insanely out of character for him. I didn't know why he was there or what he wanted. The last time we talked to each other, it was really awkward because we had a semi-dramatic breakup when I found out he was cheating on me.

I put my phone down and laughed a little saying, "You have an odd sense of timing.." I walked over to him and stood in front of him waiting for him to do something. After a few seconds he handed me a bent, tarnished golden coloured ring. Seeing that symbolic ring made me feel so incredibly sad. I felt as if a frost bit down in my stomach. Carefully, I took the ring from him and examined it and shook my head. He wasn't smiling as much now, but he was still so calm and placid. I felt as if he was waiting for me to accept what was happening. I took a well-polished gold ring off of my finger and gave it to him. Apparently it was the twin to the tarnished and twisted ring he gave me, despite how different they looked.

As I watched him put the ring in his pocket, pain welled up inside of me, but it didn't show as much on the outside as it felt within. I couldn't help but move closer and hug him. That moment seemed to last forever, as I waited for him to react. He didn't move or react to me at all, even as I hid my face between his neck and shoulder. I could feel my cheek on his neck and my hands holding on to the backs of his shoulders, but he made no movement to return my affections.

The dream just faded off afterwards. If there was any more, I forgot it.. That could have very well been the most organized dream I have ever had.

I feel as if my mind is searching for some sense of closure. Since he never provided me with any, my mind is dreaming up what it needs to move on. It's a shame that my subconscious mind is too ******** stupid to realize that my conscious mind knows that it's not real.