i keep crying in hopes that i'll stop... the tears come slowly as if they're waiting for something. i'm waiting for something. i'm not sure what.
i'm confused. i'm tired. i'm trying to fix everything that i've broken and it's not working. but you can't hit the reset button in real life. i wish i could. i wish that i could blame this on something else and say that this is fate and it's out of my hands. but i believe that whatever i do is my own fault. i don't believe in blaming others no matter how much i want to.
no matter how easy it is. it's easy to say that i'm 'masculine' because i'm being my own father figure--because i can't trust you telling me that you love me because i don't want to need your love. i don't want to need you--i've gotten along for 12 years seeing you RANDOMLY and i'll be fine WITHOUT you now. damn it... it's easy to say that i'm lazy because i'm 'depressed'. everyone's sad about something some time. it's not like i'm special. so i'm crying in hopes that i'll get everything out and it'll stop. and that i'll feel better. i'd rather fly away instead but i'm tethered to the ground.
at the very least i'll be able to sleep.
Sonic14010 Community Member 
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