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Hehehe ^^ Sooo close to October 30... *jumps up and down* ANd it's also much closer to December then the happyness gets to me ^^...

Well you see guys there is an angel that come to me at the start of my summer vacation. He was really nice to me. Come closer to the school year my childish dreams and jokes were all openned up. He made me realise the world doesn't revolve around my imagenations. He made it painfully clear my imagenations weren't real. But that did good for me you see... Now I'm not that girl that sits in a closet and daydreams. Even though he lives in California and I live in South Carolina ... well I have to tell everyone this ...

Distance has nothing to do with anything


Two days ago... I felt like crap... my Phone card had no minutes... my depression was getting to me. I had just gotten into the first fight I had ever had with my mom. I was in the bathroom with the sink full ready to cut myself. I had the knife in my hand about to cut into myself then my dad come to the bathroom door and said. "Anime Expo starts on July 1st" That made me think about how great it would be if I really got to go. Then I remembered I would also be seeing my Tenshi for the Second time in July. I sat down thinking about why I should live. I remebered the many many MANY talks I had with my Tenshi. I wouldn't be able to see him. I wouldn't be able to huggle him when he gets to my porch. So I came out of the bathroom put the knife back into the kitchen and fell asleep.