Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

 
 

View User's Journal

Stephano's Journal of Spoofy Fanfics and Drawings!
This journal's showing off some of my writing and drawing talent, and I just wanted to share it with you. Come on in and read it, my parodic oneshots are garunteed a laugh or two!
Harry Potter and the Misuse of Spells Chapter 1
Harry Potter and the Misuse of Spells

SH: This story came to mind when I was reading the Harry Potter spell list and then started to think about the many ways you could use these spells for some real mischief and evil...

Disclaimer: I do not own any other pop culture references used in this story, I only own the plot. J.K. Rowling owns the characters, spells, and books.


Chapter 1: The Misuse of Accio

Harry, Hermione, and Ron are sitting at the Gryffindor table in study hall along with Hufflepuffs, and were discussing the spell Accio. “Oh, come on, you two, it’s an easy spell to learn.” “Psh, like bloody hell it is.” Ron replied and Harry nodded in agreement while taking notes on a plant for Herbology.

Hermione rolled her eyes at their whining, “Look, it’s really simple. Just flick your wrist like this,” Hermione waved her wrist in a graceful motion, “and then, Accio, book.” One of Hermione’s text books flew into her hand and she caught it easily. “There, easy.” Hermione said and put it back down on the table. “Easy for you, Hermione, some of us weren’t gifted with your expert knowledge of proper wrist movement, and such!” Harry said, and then he and Ron started to laugh while making funny wrist movements, “Very funny, you two, now go on, you try it, Accio something, anything!” Hermione encouraged.

Ron and Harry stopped laughing momentarily to think about what they wanted to Accio, and then they both got mischievous smirks on their faces before they picked up their wands, did the proper movement and said, “Accio, Draco Malfoy’s brain! Hahaha!!” Hermione slammed her book down on the table and pinched the bridge of her nose with her index finger and thumb, “Ugh, men, they’re children, the lot of them! Now stop laughing and get back to work!”

Ron and Harry calmed down after a few more minutes and went back to work.

-5 Minutes later-

-CRASH!-


Something red and pink came flying through the window of the study hall and landed roughly on Harry and Ron’s paperwork. Hermione looked at it more closely before shouting, “Merlin’s beard, is that a brain?!” she shouted. Soon everyone around them had either become a whimpering pile of tears, and fear, or was beginning to think that the apocalypse was happening and that it was starting with raining brains. “OH, MY GOD! WE’RE ALL GONNA LOSE OUR BRAINS!!! THE ALIENS, THE ALIENS!!!” Colin Creevey began to shout, and cue mass panic in 3...2...1, “AAAAAAH!!!!” Came the collective shout of all the students, and the teachers, unsuccessfully, tried to calm them down.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione were the only ones not screaming but were still sitting at the table staring at said brain, “You don’t think it’s really his brain... do you?” Hermione asked looking the boys. “No, but... then again...” Harry said before putting his thumb and index finger to his chin. Ron decided to poke the brain with his quill, and Hermione slapped him on the hand, reprimanding him, “Don’t touch that, you don’t know where it’s been!” Ron made a face, but put his quill down. “-sigh- Well, since everyone’s in a mass panic, and the teachers are trying to calm everyone down.... I guess we’ll go to Hogsmeade to pass the time.” Hermione said uncharacteristically, but Harry and Ron didn’t care, as long as they could get very slightly smashed, then they were happy.

(I may not have spelled Hogsmeade right, but I will check...eventually...)

-In Slytherin Common Room-


Pansy, Crab, Goyle, and Blaise were staring at Draco’s unmoving body on the couch. His eyes had rolled to the back of his head, and his right nostril was enlarged and had blood trickling down his face heavily. “Draco... Are you okay?” Pansy asked before she poked his right shoulder gently. “BLARGH!” Draco shouted before falling to the ground and foaming by the mouth and started to twitch severely like he was having a seizure. “HOLY CRAP!” Blaise shouted as he fell out of his chair to get away.

Then Draco stopped moving and everything was quiet, “Uh...” Pansy moved her eyes back and forth between the three boys and then they trailed back down to Draco’s body, “Why don’t you guys go get something to eat, and I’ll take care of Draco’s body?” She asked while dragging him by his feet, “Where are you taking his body –“ “GO GET SOME FOOD!” “Okay!” the boys shouted before they ran out of the door.

Pansy grunted as she dragged Draco’s body up the stairs to her room, and was elated when she reached the top and threw his body on the bed. She muttered an Imperturbable charm so no one could hear, and was thankful that were roommates were in Hogsmeade at moment, “Now you’re all mine, Draco-poo, all mine...” Pansy said wickedly as she started to unbutton Draco’s trousers.

-End-


SH: So, that is the end of chapter one of the Misuse of Spells, and I hope you enjoyed it, next chapter is the Misuse of Aguamenti.

R

E

V

I

E

W


I

I

I

I

I

I

V





 
 
Manage Your Items
Other Stuff
Get GCash
Offers
Get Items
More Items
Where Everyone Hangs Out
Other Community Areas
Virtual Spaces
Fun Stuff
Gaia's Games
Mini-Games
Play with GCash
Play with Platinum