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Right before writing this entry, I read the one I posted before, and I noticed something funny. My dog died the day of my second month-a-versary with Steven. Speaking of which, this entry is dedicated to him.
Steven and I spend almost all day together. It was great, we had lots of fun. Yet at some point this evening my sister decided to bring up the topic of whether we would still be together a year from now. Needless to say we both said the same thing; that we both hoped so but that we didn't know whether life was going to let us. Because as you all know, s**t happens and things change. Well, it made me think. As I was thinking, I became more and more aware of our situation. Well, my situation with Dwight. I started thinking; do I really love him? Or am I just with him because I'm scared of being alone? Half of me said yes to the first, the other to the second. Steven noticed there was something wrong and held me tightly, asking me what was wrong. For the first time in my life I told someone my fears. I told him how I hated thinking of the future and why, and surprisingly, he told me he did too. He said that no matter what happened, he would always love me. And I believe him, and I will always love him as well. We will always be the closest of friends. I love the way he calms me down and doesn't stress me out whenever I'm already stressed. He makes me feel extremely happy and like I can do anything. Right before he left, he told me he would always be there for me. He let me know by his words, his kisses, and most importantly, his eyes. His eyes are magnificent. They hold this intriguing light behind them, and their color is amazing. I truly believe I love him, and I know he loves me back. No matter what happens, I will always keep him close to my heart, and I will enjoy what life has given me without thinking about the future. If it happens, great. If it doesn't, it will still be great, because I know I will always have a good friend by my side.
 Annabella Goddess Of Ice · Tue Jan 20, 2009 @ 05:18am · 0 Comments |
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