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For you my Angel
Hello Ashley. I don' know if you read your own journal entries but I hope you do and if not then I'll tell you to. Anyway I can't believe how much I miss you. I never thought I would miss you this much. Friday night I cried for a little then put on a movie to help me sleep but it didn't work. I slept for about an hour and then I couldn't go back to sleep. Yesterday I was depressed all day. Especially when you called and told me you wouldn't be able talk. Then I got texting and I was like all happy. I texted you immediately. I was so happy to get to atleast text you a little. Then all that was murdered by the fact that you couldn't talk outside U.S. waters. I was down all day yesterday and my dad was on a tare. Anyway I was sending you texts and stuff on yahoo. We rented movies last night <Saturday night> and I picked Twilight. I was choking up like the whole movie. By the end of the movie I was a little better. Anyway I was texting Liam like all night until I told him I was going to try to sleep. I told my mom and dad goodnight and went into my room. Immediately after I shut my door the tears started flowing. I threw my glasses on my dresser and flopped face down into my pillows. I couldn't stop crying. Eventually I knocked out from sheer exhaustion. My pillow was soaking wet. I couldn't help it though. Everything I had held in came out all at once. I couldn't believe it myself. I couldn't believe that I could love someone so much and that you could love me. I never thought it was possible to love someone as much as I love you but apparently it is. I do love you and I love you more than anything else in this world. I can't even play guitar without choking up because I think of all the music you've written and every time we have ever been on stage together. I don't like my I-pod anymore because almost every song I listen to reminds me of you in some way. I just didn't think I could ever love someone this much and it's crazy I know but it's true. I love you Ashley and I always will. I will never leave you and I will always listen. I will always do my best to help you out. I will never turn my back on you. Please don't ever tell me it's over. I promise I won't do anything to hurt me or you ever agian.
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