♥ I've got a smile on my face and a [******** you attitude...
{♥I lie in comfort
surrounded by your arms
your heartbeat sings me to sleep
My mind wanders through dreams of you and I
together
Imaginin your caress,
your kiss,
your smell
My heart flutters as I dream of
your smile,
your eyes,
your hands
I feel safe, secure, warm
My mind imagines playin with you
I turn to the left,
my hand falls where you are.....
where you were...
I wake to find myself alone.
I call your name but only hear the silence of emptiness
I look around but only see the darkness of loneliness
I try to find the peace of mind I had only moments ago but
I am forced to embrace the solitude that surrounds me
For the second my heart starts to ache for you
I quickly remember the ache that was given by you
I can't sleep now, my mind filled with the angered emotions I have
for you and for me
I wonder why I was stupid to give myself to you
I wonder why I was careless to let you inside my mind...
my heart
I grow more restles and more angry
My heart starts to beat faster with pain
as regret as it's drive
It aches with sadness
as my body begins to tremble not with fear
but with blood that burns every part of me
every part that you touched...
that you saw
I want to peel off my skin and have a new one,
anythin that would get me away from the sensation...
my body feels fire.
I cant seem to keep you away from me,
I try
but proof has shown itself that I can't
My face begins to burn as I hold back
the screams...
the tears
I don't want you to know my pain
yet you must know...
how can I tell you...
I cant tell you how weak you have made me
I cant tell you how much you have hurt me
I must stay strong
As my anger builds I begin to feel urges
urges that will only lead to more pain.
restless
I get up...
I walk outside
I walk with a purpose
I want my peace
I dont want pain
I want my heart
hard as stone once again
without a further thought I speed my stride and... jump
I dive head first to the one love that will always be there for me
the one love that will have all of me
surroundin me in comfort
wrappin me either warmth or cooleness
I fall deaf to my surroundins and enjoy the exctasy and peace given to me
...............
unknown time has passed
I am at peace once again
I feel tired again
I get up and leave my love for the rest I need
the strength I need...
to fight against my emotions
my pain
my sufferin
I go home and fall asleep
in deep dreams
in comfort once again♥}
... because from this day forward I'm livin my life for myself. ♥
