I am very, very happy now.
Kaie just got hired working night shifts at 7-11. I'm going to miss her like hell, because we'll have a lot less time together... but at the same time, it's a good thing, because she's making $10 an hour.
Though... I'm a bit upset about something. First of all, I'll get to see her a lot less... and after we move to Trail, she wants to keep up the night shifts. I don't know how long she wants to do that for... but I don't know if I can handle me going to bed when she's getting up to go to work. And because of the screw up in her natural body clock... her days off are going to be mostly spent sleeping. I'm a bit scared that she'll just sleep until she gets horny, call me up for a quickie, and then go back to sleep.
Also, she wants to stay here longer. She doesn't seem to get that I really, really, really don't want to do that. Almost to the point of can't do that. I've told her, but she doesn't seem to quite understand that just being here makes my skin crawl. There's something coming, and it's going to wipe out the island. People are working to stop it, but... I'm still terrified.
She was making some comment about sending me to Trail without her... but I won't do that. Aside from the fact that I *don't* know how to get an apartment or anything just yet, I refuse to go without her. What if she's still here, and the wave comes, and she dies? I don't know what I would do.
My mind is spitting two options at me, both of which would probably result in the same thing: End my life, or run to Slovenia to see Tass. But I don't see her being particularly supportive. Without anyone to take care of me (because I'm a submissive little ******** that way), I really think I would just...
*sigh* I'm worried. I'm happy, I'm glad Kaie's got this job, I'm glad that I might have a job (I'm expecting a call from Mariposa)... but I'm still kinda freaking out.
Nay-rinn · Wed Jan 18, 2006 @ 09:13pm · 3 Comments |