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1) Never drink while pregnant
2) Don't adopt kids with suspicious backgrounds
3) Be sure to check your son's tree house for porno magazines
4) When a nun is found dead and the adopted child was missing for awhile at the time with your 4 year old deaf daughter...listen to the wife
5) Just let the wife ******** smack the child when that child pulls out the roses that was sprinkled with the stillborn baby's ashes
6) Seriously...its ******** suspicious when the adopted child's arm is okay one minute then fractured the next... :/
7) Have a hose near the tree house at all time in case of random fire...
8 ) Keep a guard next to your comatose son
9) If the adopted child is trying to seduce you...just...back away slowly...
10) Body slam the adopted child when she tries to kill your 4 year old daughter cool
11) Don't let the 4 year old deaf girl use the pistol. For she shall miss and shoot the ice causing the frozen pond to crack and break almost drowning the mother and dwarf.
12) Check painting with cool lights that shows the invisible ink to see the gruesome pictures (That I admit are awe-some~)
Final Lesson?
Don't adopt a 9 year old girl unless you are certain she is truly 9 xd
There is a rare chance that she can be a 33 year old dwarf with a something something disease that gives her a childlike appearance O.O'
And the kind that was originally from a mental hospital for she had the habit of being adopted into random families, cause weird accidents, seduce the father, and when failed...kill the father and the family while setting the house on fire.


Note: Please understand that I am joking... :3
I am not trying to discourage anyone into NOT adopting kids...just saying be sure to check the background just in case xd


Orphan = When dwarfs attack