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I'm losing my friends. That's all there is to it. How can I get them back? I still have them right now but they keep slipping through my fingers. Travis and I are still goin strong but how long will that last? Jeremy is turing into a jerk. If you read this Jer I'm sorry but it's true. Everytime Roni runs to you for something you get pissed at me and start blaming me, what happened to you getting both sides of the story? Roni thinks I don't care about her because I had Travis come over on Saturday and ahe wanted me to go there. Apparently Travis is more important than her. That's not the case, it's not my fault she wants to be lazy and not go out. Heather is just Heather, she's concentrating on school so I'm not worried about that. All my friends from highschool are gone because of Alex. Am I destined to be a martyr? Am I to be te person that everyone comes to then they can just drop me like i'm nothing because they don't need me at that particular moment. I realize people change but they don't change that much. I've also been thinking a lot of me and Felix. I don't know. I'm happy with him and I'm getting the satisaction that you are supposed to be in a relationship. I love him but sometimes I feel he's just with me because he was desperate or something. He says he loves me but I don't feel that love when he touches me. Aren'tyou supposed to get some sort of tingly feeling when someone loves you? It feels like Alex all over again. At least Jeremy let me down easy. I feel Felix is dragging me along. I know I'm living with him and I might hurt our realationship if he reads this but it's not like I an go to one of my friends since they are his friends as well. I can't go to him cuz i don't have the strength. I don't want to lose him but I don't know if he is just playing with me cuz like I said.... I don't feel the love he says he has for me. I wanna cry everytime he tells me he does cuz there's no sincerity behind it. What should I do?