Currently, i am in an iffy status with a good friend of mine. She is undoubtedly the most amazing girl on the planet; she has a great sense of twisted humor, shes sweet without being clingy or drippy at all, she understands me in a way none of my best friends do, and she is the only human i know besides yours truly that can play halo for more than five hours; now thats sexy. A few months ago, i discovered she liked me as well; no issue there. The main issue is, we are both in high school (as if thats not problem enough) but im a junior and shes a freshman; thats kinda socially unacceptable. Last month, we broke off our undercover relationship for personal reasons; we were still good friends and acted like nothing happened. It all seemed ok untill last Saturday: our schools cominghome dance. I invited her to go, thinking itll be one last time before we officially need to stay just friends (we still harbor deep feelings for one another); however, this was not the case. Besides the fact she looked absolutely beautiful, we kinda partied in a way that 'just friends' don't. After everyone saw and with the social pariah out of the way, im wondering if i should reconsider being just friends with her. But here is where it gets even more complicated: i have pretty bad commitment fear; i just get miserable when im in an official relationship. i dunno if its medical or just all in my head, but it didnt bother me as much when we were hiding it last time. id be a fool to let someone so amazing slip away, but i just dont know what to do. good people of gaia, i call for your council; help me in a dark time.
Party 'till the Rapture,
F.S.
View User's Journal
Paradise Lost: How Life Kicks My a**.
For every action, there exists an equal and opposite reaction. This is a collection of past and present issues of my life that prove I must have done something irredeemably wrong to deserve this.