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It's definitely not me.

I've been having the worst luck, especially when it comes to guys. They hate me. Lesbians? Oh holy hell they're all over me! Not only have I grown an even stronger phobia to lesbians, but I've also grown very lonely.

Unfortunately, I've taken a liking to an old friend of mine who lives out of state. Of course, some say that the 11:30 p.m. phone calls on school nights are rather outlandish, along with texting almost all the time. I've suggested the idea of dating twice...And have been turned down twice. Well he recently got back together with an ex girlfriend of his, and this girl is like, gorgeous. I can't compete, seriously. Compared to this chick, I look like a dude. Anyway, I die just a bit inside when he posts something about her, talks about her, or whatever. I can't stop him though, he's happy, and he has someone. Which, this makes me feel like crap.

Well I was in a mood tonight, and I got bored and was looking at my friend's pictures. I saw a picture of him and this girl, and it was a really nice picture of both of them. Seriously, I would've rather had someone punch me in the mouth. So, I was texting him, and he knew I was in a bad mood, but I pretty much just hinted around it. Instead of trying to make me feel better about it, he does nothing. I don't know if it's just because he doesn't know how to handle a situation like that...Or I'm just not worth the time or effort to try and cheer up...Since that was pretty much the vibe I was getting.

So in a darker mood I sit, and I decided to check my Myspace. Well I have a cousin who I felt I was pretty tight with...Well she took me completely off her friends list. Her boyfriend took me of his, and her friend (who I thought was mine as well,) didn't even bother to acknowledge the friend request I sent her back in August. So this led to sitting in the bathroom floor, texting my best friend and crying hysterically for about a half an hour. Aaaand that's where this ends.

That just seems to be my luck, I'm thankful for the few close friends I have. Though, I'm pretty much scarred about letting anyone else that close to me from this point...I mean, wouldn't you?