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Sad.
Again.
Read his journal entry today and it seemed to justify what I had been thinking...
There must be something I am doing wrong...or maybe it's just who I'm choosing.
I loved him, I really did, so much that it hurt. And here it is I had to see him walk off...for him to try and be happy with someone else. It's not that I don't want him to be happy, I wanted him to be happy with me, and I feel like throwing a tantrum because he couldn't, or it didn't seem like he could. Why don't things go the way they're supposed to?
GODDAMNIT!!! crying

-edit-

No matter how much I try to push the reoccuring thoughts and feelings away, I cannot deny it...I am still in love with him. What, am I supposed to turn off my feelings? He wasn't perfect, but neither was I. No, we weren't exactly alike but still, it felt so comfortable being with him...and cuddly. Now here I am, sad, and I've got to huddle in the corner and watch him seemingly drift away. I refuse to lose him completely. Even if I can't have him for my own, I want to see him be happy and I want to be a positive part of his life. neutral