Today is the worst I've felt in a long time...
I keep finding out s**t about this girl that I've known for over 3 years and dated off and on for around 2...
I'm not going to use her actual name so I'll call her "A".
Well, A is becoming less and less the wonderful girl I use to know and love... She can't seem to stop lying about stuff she's been doing. It's ironic though because so many of the things that she's asked me not to do in the past and told me that she would end our relationship over are things that she herself has recently been doing.
It hurts so bad every time I find out that she has done something like this... I feel like she's changed so much from the trustworthy girl that I use to know and love. I can't even look at her the same way now.
I keep telling her to be honest and just tell me... But she doesn't and I find out anyway, which only makes things worse...
Every time I hear the same bullshit answer, "I'm so sorry, I love you more than anything. I'll never lie to you again, I promise." That really seemed sincere the first time she said it. So, I gave her another chance.
This is the 5th time she's done this to me now. When will I learn? I guess I'm just a dumbass.. I should just drop her right now and move on right? Well, I honestly don't see how I could live without her.
Yeh, feelings and s**t, they suck. I wish I could stop being a whiney a** face and just do what needs to be done.
I'm sitting here, stomach hurting, an anxious mess, trying to decide what needs to be done. Feeling like crap. Hating this post because it's full of drama s**t. dramallama But, it kinda helps to write it and get it out of my head.
I just hope I can make the right decision because I'm running out of forgiveness.
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