“It happened almost seven years ago now. Before that I was a mortal man; happy and ignorant of this state I would come to. You probably think I’m exaggerating, but it’s true. You don’t know how lonely it is out here; how painful it is to lose yourself, to share your body with that of a beast over whom you have no control…” Hyde smiled thinly.
Hester did think he was exaggerating. She had always wanted a tail. But she wanted him to continue with his tale, and so she said nothing.
“I suppose I should start at the beginning, though it may be boring for an adventurer such as yourself. I was born to a family not bowed down by poverty, but not prosperous either. My father owned a small farm, and my mother took in laundry and needlework from around the village. I was the second son, close enough in age to my older brother for there to be a closeness between us. He was the one who taught me to read and write. Unfortunately I have not found much use for the skill, and it became a source of frustration, since when my elder brother went into the priesthood all his tasks at home fell to me and I was bound more than ever to home. I thought I was miserable then…” Hyde laughed with a hollow sound.
Hester tapped her finger on the table, tracing the grooves in the wood. Hyde’s story was not holding her attention. This world seemed similar to hers, with struggling families, crushed hopes and priests still present. She had hoped for wizards, wonderful journeys and castles and treetop cottages.
“One thing made it seem almost bearable; and that was my Lilly. Of course, she is no longer mine, and never will be again, but I still remember her thus. My heart was hers, and still is.”
Hester puffed out her cheeks. Now Hyde had completely lost her.
“She was a kind, lovely girl; beautiful too. She had long, long hair, though she always kept it tied up. I saw it down only once, and it’s a sight I shall never forget. When I die I want that image of her; for no angel could look lovelier, to be the last thing that flits across my mind. She lived in the next village over, where the markets were always held, and it was a long walk. My father did not disapprove of my going there, but he would not let me borrow his horse to do so. I think he perhaps half hoped that a better prospect would come along, a girl with more money and less sense, for my Lilly was poor, poorer than us by far. I walked the eight miles to her house every Friday, though it took me close to three hours to walk there, and often longer to get back.” Hyde’s face had lost its previous humourless smile and was lit by some inner warmth the mere memory of his lost love brought. He looked younger, and the scars on his face seemed more pronounced. Even though Hester was not the least interested in his story as of yet, this transformation struck her. She found herself watching, and listening more.
“I always left early, as the sun rose, to get to Lilly’s house as soon as I could. I had always to leave early, to avoid the night. My mother would worry herself senseless if I did not come home before dark. The roads are dangerous at night, not just with thieves but other creatures too. That walk back always seemed longer somehow, reluctant as I was to leave Lilly and still tired from the morning walk. As our affections grew those few hours a week seemed to get shorter and shorter. She walked with me a mile or so back; and I began to stay later. Then one day I simply forgot the time, until my Lilly remarked that it was almost sunset. Her father would not allow me to stay at their house, so I had no choice but to start the walk. It was a full moon that night.” Hyde shivered, his ears and tail twitching too. “I was tired, more so than usual. My father had been ill, and I had done more than my fair share of work that week. Before long the pain in my feet and the heaviness of body and heart became too much. I passed by a little hillock, carpeted with soft looking grass and pockets of daisies and wild flowers. I was tired, and it was many miles still till home. My father would be angry either way, I thought no harm would come of it. I laid down my head, on that little hill in the glare of the full moon, and that was the last time I slept as a man and not a monster. I had a dream, a fearful horrible thing. In it I saw a man whose face I swore I had never seen before, but who was known to me. I knew he was the Devil. In the dream I still was sleeping on the grassy knoll, but at the same time I saw the Evil One come towards me with something in his hand. It was a skin; a wolf skin. He lay it down over me and I was engulfed in such horrible heat, I felt as if my throat were full of fur. I could not breathe. The skin covered me so completely, there was no gap for air to pass. I felt a hand, burning hotter than the fetid skin around me, touch my head and run down my spine. I felt terror, and then a growl rose in my throat, my body twisted as the skin pulled me into a new shape and I looked up at the moon and I howled, and I howled.”
Hester leaned forward, feeling a shiver run down her spine as Hyde recounted the tale of his curse. She could imagine it all, the eyes of the man Hyde said was the devil peering down at her, the wolf skin falling and wrapping round her of its own volition. Another shudder passed down her spine.
“When I woke I was in the same spot. I thought for one heavenly moment all had been a dream, but of course as I sat up I felt something twisted beneath me; my tail. And when I discovered that, my hands went swiftly to my head and found my new ears. I wept, and then I rose and then I walked home. You can probably imagine the reaction of my parents. My mother screamed, howling as I had done the night before. My father went white with rage. My younger brothers and sisters thought it all a joke until they saw our mother sobbing, and then they were afraid. I remember my father going for the cleaver, shouting that he would cut the ears and tail clean off, and solve the problem, but my mother cried and held him until he gave up. I hid until he had calmed down, but by then the news was abroad in the village. I could not be allowed to stay. They did not even want to wait for the next full moon, they wanted me gone then. The following night my mother helped me pack. I intended going to see Lilly, to speak to her one final time, for there was no question of our marriage when I was in such a state. I could not risk it. I spoke of my intentions to my mother and she cried and grabbed hold of me. She told me that if I went to Lilly her father and brothers would surely murder me, they had threatened to do so already. I was cast out with nowhere to go.”
Hester imagined this scenario, and in her childish way could do nothing but envy Hyde the freedom he had been offered, of going anywhere and starting from nothing. It had not seemed like freedom to him though.
“As I walked I had only the company of my thoughts. I knew now what I had become, as did the people I met. I wanted to bring harm to no one, for I knew that as soon as I caused harm to another human being I would be lost forever to the curse that had been placed on me. So I searched for a place where I would be untroubled. After three weeks I found this wood, and I made this my home. I left a warning at the last village I passed through before arriving here, and I took charge of these trees as my territory. I spent the first few days exploring, and then came the full moon.” Hyde shook his head at the remembrance. “It was just like in the dream, only a thousand times worse for pain had been dulled in the dream. When I had recovered I began work on this house, on making my situation more comfortable. I thought of Lilly, and my past life often, but I could not afford to indulge in my misery. I was never at ease. Often I feared that some young adventurer, fancying himself a warrior, perhaps with his eye on one of the nearby village maidens as well, would come and seek to make his name by slaughtering me. I did not want to become a nuisance to the villagers, and so I journeyed to them often in the first year. I soon learned that I was not wanted though, and I retreated. They leave me in peace too, warning people away when they can, for which I am grateful.” He lapsed into a thoughtful sort of a silence.
“Is that the end?” Hester asked, thinking it didn’t sound much of an end to her.
“Yes. It is for now.” Hyde murmured, turning his attention to the stew which was still bubbling over the fire.
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Moth's Tales
Since I tend to turn my avatars into characters, I thought I might expand on the whole idea a bit. Comments and feedback are greatly appreciated.
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