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These are the records of certain occurrences and musings in my life. It is probably not of much importance to you, unless you enjoy being a sleuth or have some vague interest in listening to me prattle about my flavour-of-the-month.
When the day set, you were gone beyond the horizon. I lived by the nighttime, I didn't miss you. In time, I missed your warmth, the radiance of your smile, but I'd almost forgotten it all, it only remained in my memories like a hazy dawn-coloured sketch.

When I saw you again, the light flooded me, but I'd shut my eyes for so long it was painful. Still, I knew it was worth enduring.

Like the sun, you shine so brightly, with an energy that's fierce and alluring
But... like the sun, the closer I get, the more you burn me

I've been nursing my wounds carefully, trying to match your careless optimism, trying to find a way to face your brightness without being blinded, and... hoping that someday, it'll stop burning. That you'll let me see the real you again.

I don't know if that's possible, I try not to let it consume me, but... when we're together, I know I love you so much. So much that I'm afraid that if you never love me again... I'll never find room for another person in my heart. It scares me so much. But I'm trying to live one day at a time, and it's easier to be happier about the little things now. I still think about you all the time, but it's... easier. But knowing you don't feel this way for me never stops hurting me. That's just the way it is.

Patiently, I'll wait for the sun to rise each day. I'm happy that it does at all.





 
 
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