5:30 PM on wednesday.
Selah comes over. we rush around to do our ******** homework before 6 when class starts. We leave my house around 630. and realize we are never going to make it. So we go to taco bell. While at taco bell i look out the window and notice a guy. I stare at him for a moment, and realize that the OTHER guy is staring at me. So, instead of being logical and mature and just looking away i freaked out and had to tape stuff on the window so they couldn't see me. They we're like wtf? so everytime one came in selah and i both freaked out. Then later, this guy in red (who was staring at me first) comes in and slurrs
"HEY GIRL IN THE GLASSES!! (selah) My friend thinks you are foiinnee."
we're just like wtf? so then she goes out side, talks to them... blah blah blah. comes back in and we're finishing. (I want taco bell again.) so then they come inside, and this guy who thinks he is so cool sits on selahs lap. she's practically wording "help!" to me and the guy behind me. Guy in red keeps touching me, poking my arm asking me questions.. and they are flirting. they guy that wanted selah would not leave her alone. he kept asking for a kiss, so I explained to them that we are together, so she can't.
then they tried to negotiate. "How about if josh kisses chelsea (josh = red guy) than you kiss me?"
Me- "um no. because selah and I are together, so I can't."
red- "wwhhhaa you don find me attractive??"
so that goes on for a few minutes. They ask us our music interest, we tell them we like slipknot. they are 'rockstars' they like the doors, and cool rocky bands.
so rockstar dude that like selah realizes he's not getting any from us, so he gets mad. he leaves. comes back, sticks his head in the door and says
"oh by the way SLIPKNOT ******** SUCKS!!!" and walks out.
If you know selah or I, you know you don't ******** with our music.
selah goes after him, SCREAMING yelling pushing him etc etc. he is jumping around trying to avoid her like stewie in the family guy where peter takes him to disneyworld.
I go out there i say something like "YOU ARE JUST AN EMO f**! WE'RE LESBIANS WE DON"T LIKE c**k!! ARE YOU STUPID? GET THE ******** AWAY!!" and selah throws a huge woodan plank at his head.
They run inside. I get the idea, "s**t they are WALKING, we have a car. lets go fill up our drinks all the way and throw them at them!" (this is why you don't ******** with us.) so, we fill up our drinks get in the car and find them.
I through my large full cherry pepsi, and then i threw selahs Mt. Dew code red. Both hit them. went everywhere. they were soaked. they threw a beer can at us, it GOT EVERYWHERE!!!!! like, the walls on both selah and i.. it was bad. So this pissed me off. I get the last word. or in this case, the last.. uh... er... whatever.
so i look into selahs floor board area thingy, and seatch and finally find a full red gatorade. i open it,. we turn around. i threw THAT at them, hit on inlike the shoulder and ran away. then later we decided we wanted to cause more trouble, but couldn't because she wasn't home. so we decide... (some of you will think this is absolutely gross,) actually im not even going to type it. f you really wanna know ask me.
But what we were going to didn't work because we couldn't find annoying emo fags.
somewhere around 9PM same night.
Selah and I finally get to Mehdi's party, we look hot. we get there.. One of the reasons i love Mehdi's parties is everytime i show up everyone is like "CHELSEA!!!!!" *hugs* So, i always feel good.
Jake was even nice to me!1 and the first thing he said to me (wich is one reason why my nickname is Jager) Is "oh hey chelsea yeah! come here i have something to show you!" or something like that, we go into the kitchen and he's like "I HAVE JAGERMEISTER FOR YOU!!!!" i get so excited.
for all of you to know, Jager is my ********... drink. i love it.
so I almost teared up because i was so excited. I asked if there was monster. he said yes, so i immidietly decide to do a shot. this seems logical. so selah and i do a shot. and then i do another shot. and then i walked around, and then i did another shot.
then i took pictures with everysingle person there.
another shot.
shot with jared.
shot with joe.
shot with kourtnie....
yeah... lol.
Im getting pretty tipsy so by now i'm doing one of these numbers
"Selah.. I love you. so much. you're my favourite. even though.. we've been through s**t, I love you. i think you're awesome. i love you so much! you're my best friend..." so on and so forth. she is doing the same because she is tipsy. And we are hugging and loving, and it is good times.
The Drama.
Well, Of course. you can't have a party with out gay drama. So, Cliff gets jumped. He is hit pretty hard. The cops are called. Jake is making a huge deal out of it, and scaring people, wich is not the way to handle a situation despite what he thinks. So, the cops come, and mehdi comes in to tell everyone to hold off on the drinking. Kourntie and I are about to take a shot.
Kourntie and I think it is definitely a wise idea to go into mehdi's dads room to finish consuming alcohol. We go into his bathroom take a shot of jager, and a shot of tequilla rose. we are laughing. we think we are clever. we think the cops will nevvveerrrr find us and our underage drinking asses. (wich they didn't but thats because they didn't look. if they looked, they coulda found us. we were YELLLNG and laughing.)
so we come out like 30 minutes later, way more drunk than we went in, and kourtnie wanders off. I decide to go see how the cop situation is doing. I go outside and find, i believe it was frankie and joe. i sit and i'm like "so the cops left?" Nope. the cops are RIGHT behind me. the sheriff. mmhmm. so i decide, i am dumb and i should go inside.
mehdi comes in, and tells everyone to pick up because cliffs moms going to come, and that is way more scary. if cliffs mom decides she knows there is alcohol, she is going to put mehdi in handcuffs, so we clean EVERYTHING. and we did a damn good job thank you. so after that, im not really sure what happened.
I remember like everyone leaving, and I got more drunker. yes i said more drunker. The next thing i know, i am in mehdi's bedroom laying between frankie and lexi bawling my eyes out about someone who I am not going to name.
Its really weird to cry while drunk. it felt weird. so finally, joe and jake come back, and i eat an extreme sausage sandwich,. wich was really difficult.
I then stumble around and drink more.
then i am laying outside. and allan is trying to pick me up to go to the pool. not happening.
i was very very very drunk at this point.
then i am laying on the couch... allan decides to draw on me.(some more. I already had "id tap that" above my a** and "allan was here" on my shoulder, and i think i already had "4:33" on my shoulder on the front already.) and he draws a face around my belly button, wich turns ou t to look like a mexican peter from family guy. allan names it carlos, and proceeds to put a cigarette in my belly button and take pictures. there are about 825 pictures of allan and his boyfriend carlos. LOL. We decided to WAKE UP everyone to show them carlos. they were not as thrilled.
at one point we go into mehdis dads bedroom to find a sleep[ing naked chick and a sleeping jon. jon was not really asleep. allan decides to write "I GOT SOME" on jons chest (since he was a virgin, and he lost it that night.) it came out very lopsided.
5:30 AM. wednesday morning.
Idecide i am really effing tired. i go to sleep. Allan and joe, who are now the only people up, decide that that is not possiable. im laying ont he couch thingy. they are talking to me. i am mad. Allan dives onto me in his boxers and decides to ride me. I do find this to be funny since he is moaning and touching hisnipples. I start calling him a b***h. and telling him to ride me. HAHAHA. he stops and pretends to start crying, and then is like "im a slut, i need chocolate."
it was funny. FINALLY, I am allowed to sleep. So i do.
A ******** HOUR later. 7AM.
Yes. one hour. fell asleep at 6. and joe allan and jon come in trying to get me to put my had in a tub of luke warm water. all i hear is "ARE YOU PEEING YET? ARE YOU PEEING?" I didn't. the only thing that happened was i had a wet hand. so they are laughing. and apparanlt,y they tried this on everyone.
Then there is talk about pubes. cliff shaved his pubes with mehdi's electric shaver, and allan/jon/joe all remembered. the decided that they needed to use cliffs pubes on jake some how.
the original plan was to glue them onto his face. i talked them out of it because he would of woken up.
No one wants to get cliffs pubes out of the shaver. they are voting. they come back to me. "chelsea, take one for the team. touch cliffs pubes. " "no."
they go to lance.
"Lance, don't be gay! touch cliffs pubes!!"
Finally i'm like "OK i will do it." so they get all excited and bring me the shaver and i put the pubes in a cup. then i decide i should put a li ttle water in the cup so the pubes don't stick to the side.
then i get the idea that i should pour it in jakes mouth.
yes, thats right ladies and gentlemen, i poured Pubes into Jakes mouth. HAHAHA. we got it on video too, if i can find the camera. When i did it, we all bolted. it was very funny to see 3 guys try to get through one door frame. it looked like something out of the 3 stooges.
also, Jake doesn't know that it was pubes. we just told him it was water. and later when he least expects it we're going to tell him.
It was a good night aside from the cops,and poor mehdi.
Epilogue.
Well, The next day i was ******** up all day, and lost joes camera. I am very sad because of it, although i think i will find it. But, yeah i think i was ******** up all day because i got one hour of sleep, but it was very weird. yes, but i think what the main thing to this story is I love selah. yes i do.
