Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

Understanding...
-Sarabellam Ivy
May be alittle bit graphic
She sat beside him happy and joyful as she could be. She laughed with him and told him many things even thigs she wouldn't tell her own sister. She felt a deep connection between him and her, but was too shy to say a word. Her feelings grew stronger and stronger the more she saw through his eyes.
"I remember this one time when I was small, I was with my mother and then we were near the garden, there was an herb there that would make people spit up for medical reasons. Obcourse I ate it and I was in the bathroom constantly for about a week!" he laughed.
"You ate it even after she said no?" she looked at him puzzled not understanding fully.
"Yes I didn't believe her about it, so I saw for myself" he sipped his drink then looked at her.
"I'm sure if you didn't believe something your mother told you, you would have done the same thing" he toyed with her nudging her with his elbow lightly. She giggled placing her drink down.
"My mother is dead, as you might know" she looked away from him, an instant sense of fear filled the room.
"Cheer up now, surely you remember something about your mother" he sat his drink on the table beside hers turning to look her in the eyes. She turned around back to him then again away blushing hard.
"Well...I never really disobeyed her....it was just one of those things for me" she placed her hands in her lap lying, knowing she couldn't even remember her days with her mother. He looked at her feeling how content she was, then looked at her hands he could feel her sadness, he understood her sadness.
"There are times when I can't remember things too-" he placed his hand near her leg.
"Maybe it'll come back, maybe not, but you'll always have her here" he began to reach his hand for her heart then stopped, slapping his hand on his chest grinning. She looked at him her eyes glittered like stars, her joy returned to her as it once was.
"You know, I'm glad to have you...as a friend" she stammered blushing. She turned her head away from him, so he couldn't see, but he did see it. He could feel her tension, her heat he was finally seeing, understanding her fully. Like he had found a key to unlock a door to a new world he fully could see her now.
"Are you sure-" He placed his hand over hers which were still in her lap, careful not to alarm her too much. She turned her head quickly looking at his hand then into his deep blue eyes. she could feel herself slowly leaning into him, not by her own will but by some force inside of her.
"That were just friends" he leaned in even more nearly touching her lips. She began to close her eyes allowing her feelings to take over completely, her body tensed up instantly trying to gaurd herself but she wasn't trying to put up a fight. Then she could feel it, she could feel her lips touch his as her body was feeling ever so lighter like a burden had been lifted from her that was bothering her, time seemed to stop almost instantly. she smiled alittle as he pulled away from her. She opened her eyes staring into his, his eyes glistened longing to feel her soft touch more and more as his gaze deepened. Unresistant she fell into his outstretched arms pressing her head againist his chest. His hands clasped onto her's laying his head ontop of her long dark blue hair. He pressed his nose againist her hair smelling the gentle scent of plumeria. She wrapped her hands around his body, breaking away from the hold he had on her hands. She wrapped her head around his neck close to his ear, he could feel her breathing heavily, he could even hear himself breathing hard. His breath calming him trying to force him away from doing something that he might regret later. He lightly kissed the top of her head as if she was a child and laid his head there staring at a wall.
"Why now?" he whispered to her.
"Because....you've already seen part of me, why not all of me?" she whispered back kissing his neck. He looked at her, pulling away to gaze into her eyes. The erge he had been fighting all this time became aroused, endulged, and he couldn't fight it any longer. He quickly pulled her towards him kissing her lips again. She was shocked unexpecting his reaction. His hands wrapped aroung her waist as his tongue went into her mouth. She followed his lead doing the same, his lips glided down to her neck kissing it too, then gliding back up kissing her lips again. She gasped as she suddenly found it harder and harder to breath. Images in her head came back from when she was little, something that had happened to her that she was frightened to ever tell even him. She could hear the younger her screaming, shouting at a man. She was telling him to stop, it hurts, don't do this please tears formed in her eyes. She suddenly came to he was kissing her again. She could feel him push her slightly she fell down onto the couch, her hands beside her one on the arm of the chair and the other on a pillow. Him right ontop of her, He came close to her face breathing heavily. Temptation, a jealous mistress he thought to himself as he stared into her defenseless eyes. She began to breath irregularly, she could tell what he wanted to do now but she was motionless unable to stop him. He looked into her eyes nearly distarcting her as his hands explored her body, feeling up her shirt he kissed her nose, her neck then her lips as he began to undo her top then his revealing a lean body, kissing her bare chest, He pulled a arm of her shirt away to the side revealing her breast, he kissed her there and nudged them softly. She could feel her lips quiver, she moaned deeply out of pleasure unable to fight herself. She looked into his eyes and everytime she saw the man she feared the most, she was becoming the frightened girl that she was long ago more and more each time.
"Stop" she whispered. but he didn't hear her. He started to undo her skirt
"STOP" she began to scream. but again he didn't. Forceful to stop him, she pushed up facing him, He popped up as she pushed him back.
"STOP!" she screamed she she held her top over her chest. She breathed heavily.
"Please...don't do this" she begged. He looked into her eyes, they were filled with sadness and fear. Did I do this? he asked himself. Soon taking back his words he got up standing before her he turned back around.He put back on his shirt not turning around. She sat there holding her top not looking at him, but at the floor.
"I thought that I understood what you really wanted, I thought you shared my feelings" he said not turning around to face her. She buttoned back her top.
"You can never begin to understand how my mind works, never" she said in a low voice she stayed where she was sitting up right. They didn't say anything to each other for awhile. he finally turned back around.
"Why won't you let me in? Why won't you tell people how you feel so you'll won't be alone"
"Because I prefer to be alone"
"Can't you see how it's affecting you?"
"You don't know how it effects me" she scowled.
"I do, oh I do, you think that everyone is your enemy you don't even trust your own sister" he pointed at her.
"I do trust my sister-" she stood up her eyes angry.
"I just don't trust you" she started to walk away but he grabbed her arm pulling her againist him. He wasn't going to fight or yell at her, it would only make it worse.
"Tell me why you don't trust me" he said calmly. She looked shocked turning her face away. She could feel herself wanting to cry, run far away from him.
"Because, because I don't!" she looked at him her eyes watering.
"Why? What have I done to you?" he was calm, almost freightening to her. He stared at her not looking away. She quickly tried to pull away but he just pulled her back.
"What..have I..done to you" she lashed her head facing his.
"You made me love you!" she cried tears draining from her eyes. He was shocked she quickly pulled away running from him out of the room. He stood there still, she was right he could never begin to understand her.
*To Be Continued*
This goes to one of my stories that I plan to put on fanfiction, there are lots of stories that i write but I'll be sure to post at least one part to them and the link but this is to come!