OMG, Sirius Black, eek!!!! I wuv u!
Now presenting... Remus Lupin, everyone's favorite wittle werewolf. By the way, since when did this become a fashion show?
James Potter has come back from the dead!!!!!!! At least in my messed up little world. (big, big sweatdrop)
It is Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived, the Chosen One, the Protector of Hogwarts (I read it in a fanfic, what can I say. Well, thanks to the person who created the Midnight Series. I wuv u, u r my hero. Second to JKR of whom I have severe issues with for killing off my Paddy. Yes, my Paddy *fights lawyers off with a broom*. Mine! All mine! SIRIUS LIVES!!!!!),the Boy Who Scored, etc. He's wearing Dudley's clothes and is complete with scar. Look very closely.
It's our fave werewolf again, but this time in the Hogwart's School uniform.
OMG. Harry Potter is the new Minister of Magic. That is if he survives the 7th book. He probably won't though. What has led me to this conclusion? Must I type it. Well, there was once a man named Sirius Black(everyone groans). There were absolutely no signs of him dying(unless he was caught by the Ministry of course, which was very unlikely because the Ministry was full of a bunch of dunderheads.*cough*Cornelius Fudge*cough* and he was well hidden). The man strolls out one day and finds that his dear godson was in trouble with Death Eaters because of a vision he had. Now, our dear Sirius Black, being the reckless, selfless man that he was decides to go after him along with many other members of a group called the Order of the Phoenix led by a(very old!) man named Albus Dumbledore even after he had been repeatedly told to stay put. To make a long story short, Sirius duels his cousin Bellatrix and is hit by a spell. He falls into a veil(of death) and so far hasn't come back. And JKR says she's NOT planning on bringing him back*SOB, CRY*, but as I said before, MY SIRIUS, MINE, ALL MINE. Well, anyway you can see why Harry has gray (or grey!) hair. Well, hopefully he's not a bad, power hungry Minister*cough*Fudge*cough*.
Harry has finally found his animagus form, a... cat? BORING! BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
He even forgot his wand. (Sirius appears out of nowhere)
Sirius: More like u did.
Me: I so did not. I liked u better in the books.
Sirius:Well, this ain't the books.
(continue bickering)
Dudley Dursley! OK...EEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!! He is so cheap. About 1800 gold.
Harry Potter at the second task...when Sirius was still alive.
Sirius: Hello, I'm right here.
Me sad clings to Sirius like the fool I am)
Sirius:Uh... it's alright, I guess. (awkwardly pats head)
Me:*sob* You're alive.
Sirius: Yeah...
Me: I knew it, I knew I wasn't crazy.
Sirius: Hey, I never said that.
(start bickering again)
(Remus Lupin appears out of nowhere)
To be continued...
Me: Now presenting...
Sirius: Ron Weasley!
Me sad whacks Sirius in the head)
Sirius: Hey, what was that for.
Me: The tension was starting to get thick and you interupt saying(in stupid voice) doo... Ron Weasley.
Sirius: Hey, I do not sound like that.
(inspired by after midnite with Larry Morgan and Telephone Tim)
Remus: I'm feeling left out. Do I get a part?
Sirius & Me: NO! (continue bickering)
Remus: But...
Me: Shut up were boy.
Remus: Shhh...
Me: Everyone already knows.
Remus sad looks down dejectedly)
Me: Aw, I'm sawwy. Hugs. (hugs Remus only)
Sirius: What about me?
Me: Oh, I'm sorry (sticks tongue out)
(Sirius and me start bickering)
Remus: *sigh*
Me: Tom Riddle Jr. as a kid!
Sirius: EW!
Me: Hey, he's hot. (Even though I hate Lord Voldemort, the avatar is kinda cute.)
Sirius: EW-er!
Remus: I hate to break it to you, but Tom didn't have red eyes as a kid.
Me: Killjoy!
Remus: (Quizzical look)
Sirius: Ashley is stupid! (in sing song voice)
Me: Hey, I'm not stupid.
Sirius: So said the baby from the 'Evil Strawberry' on albinoblacksheep.com.
Me: My lowest grade on my report card last year was a 94 in honors math. Plus Remus is just smart.
Remus: What did you mean by killjoy?
Me: (whispers to Sirius) I spoke too soon. Luckily it's not that time of the month, or he'd be able to hear me.
...
Remus: Well?
Me: What I meant was red eyes are hot!
Remus& Sirius: (hit thier heads)
Remus: Oh, and when you were whispering to Sirius, I heard you.
Me: How!? I mean who else heard me?
Remus: Better question. Who didn't hear you.
(rare silence)
(silence broken by angry, sleepy neighbors with torches)
Me: Shoot! Well, it's beddy-by time. Sirius, Remus you two fight over the guest bedroom (that I don't have, mind you). The loser sleeps with me.
Sirius& Remus: (stare at me in horror then start fighting over the couch)(the couch is my guest bedroom)
CRASH BREAK RIP RIP GROWL MOO...
As fate would have it, Remus won. Remind me to never get into a fight with a werewolf (full moon or not).
Me: (drags a very reluctant Sirius into my room) Night Moony, Padfoot.
Sirius: (tranforms into Padfoot and curls up at the foot of my bed)
To be continued...
Me: Moldywart in all his glory.
Remus: She means Voldemort.
Me: No, I don't.
Remus: Padfoot's been awfully quiet.
Sirius: What do u expect. I've been tramatized by her snoring.
Me: Hey, I do not snore.
(start bickering)
Remus: All they do is bicker.
Me: Well, I got a Steelers game to catch. Ya know, the one against the Panthers in which we lose by 2 points. Score: 15 to 13.
Let's go! (drags Sirius and Remus to couch)
All: GO STEELERS!
(James Potter appears out of nowhere and watches the game)
James: Go Steelers!
To be continued...
Me: Now presenting... Regulus Black. (whacks Remus in the head)
Remus: What was that for?
Me: You were supposed to say Regulus Black.
Remus: Well, when Sirius said Ron Weasley one time, you hit him in the head.
Me: (ignores Remus) You guys are the worst assistant peoples ever!
Remus: We can't read your mind.
Me: Well, good assistant peoples should be able to read minds.
Sirius: Is that my brother, Regulus Black?
Me: No, it's the Regulus who lives in your pants.
Sirius: Who told you about little Reggie.
James: Your brother is living in your pants.
(awkward silence)
...
James: That came out wrong.
Sirius, Remus,& Me: Yeah...
...
Me: Wait, James, you're alive.
James: Yup(puffs chest out proudly)
Me: (hugs James)
Me: I knew it.
...
Sirius: (pulls pants out slightly) Hi, little Reggie.
James, Remus,& Me: (stare at Sirius in horror)
...
James: That's just wrong Padfoot.
PS I promise I won't mention little Reggie again.
Me: Sirius after he escaped from Askaban.
Sirius: Hey, my clothes didn't look that bad.
James sad under his breath) Yeah, they looked worse.
Remus: Before you two start bickering(again), Padfoot, physically you looked worse than that, Ashley, his clothes didn't look that bad.
...
Sirius& Me: (stare at Remus and then start bickering)
Remus: (rubs temples)
James: (claps Remus on the back) Hey, you tried, mate.
Me: Now presenting...
Sirius, James,& Remus: The Weasley Twins!
Me: (teary eyed) I couldn't be more proud of you. (blows nose)
Sirius: It's easier when we're intoducing fellow pranksters.
Me: I know. That's what their here for.
Sirius, James, Remus,& Me: We wuv u.
Sirius, James,& Remus: In a 'straight' kind of way.
Me: In a 'I wanna marry u' kinda way.
Sirius, James,& Remus: (stare at me in horror)
...
Me: What?
Me: (in disgusted voice) Peter Pettigrew.
Sirius, James,& Remus: Trator!
...
Remus: I don't remember Peter having glasses.
Me: Well, in my world, he does.
James: Your world's messed up.
Me: If I didn't have this messed up world, you and Sirius would be dead.
...
Me: That effectivly shut them up.
Me: An absolutly adorable Remus Lupin avatar.
Remus: Are you saying I'm adorable?
Me: I said the avatar. But you are kinda cute. (book version, NOT movie version)
Remus: Guys, a little help.
James& Sirius: (from behind couch) You're on your own.
Remus: Some friends you are.
Me: Hermione Granger! The first girl so far.
Sirius: No way! Hermione's a girl. If I'd known that, I would have asked her on a date. (slicks hair back and sprays colone in his mouth) *cough, cough*
Remus biggrin o you realize that you just sprayed colone in your mouth?
Sirius: Yeah, the girls think it's sexy.
Remus, James,& Sirius: (look at me)
Me: (in mezmerized (sp?) state)
Sirius: See, I told you it works.
Me: (snaps out of it) Does not!
(me and Sirius start bickering)
Remus: Hey, Ash, why didn't you put the any of the girls before this?
James& Sirius: Because she's sexist.
Me: Am NOT!
James& Sirius: ARE TOO!
Me: Nn!(Translation-NOT)
James& Sirius: Mm!(Translation-Uh huh)
Remus: Will you guys please ST!(Translation-Stop)
(argument belongs to Disney Channel, Not me)
...
Remus: THANK YOU!
Me: Okie-Dokie. This one is Ginny Weasley, and I am NOT sexist. Plus if I was sexist, which I'm not, it would be against guys not girls.
James: She's in denial.
Me: Am not!
(start arguing) (I only bicker with Sirius)
Remus: This is not right.
Me& James: What?
Remus: I mean, Ashley only bickers with Sirius. Her bickering with someone else is just... Wrong.
Me: We weren't bickering, we were arguing. I only bicker with Sirius.
James: Speaking of Sirius, I haven't heard him this whole time.
Remus, James,& Me: (look at Sirius)
Sirius: (drool) Ginny is hot.
(Harry randomly appears out of nowhere)
Harry: (whacks Sirius in the head) Ginny is my Girlfriend.
(Harry dissappears as randomly as he appeared)
Me: Okay...
Me: *sigh* Do I really have to do this.
James& Sirius: YES!
Remus: I don't know why everyone's making a big deal out of who says his name. Draco Malfoy.
Me: Eek! (grabs blankie and hides)
Sirius& James: (hides)
Remus: What's wrong?
James, Sirius,& Me: He is so... SLYTHERIN!!!!!!
Remus: (passes out)
Everyone but Remus: OMG, HE'S DEAD!!!!
(10 min. later)
Me: Okay, Remus only sustain a minor head injury.
James: But he'll be back.
Sirius: After the next avatar, of course.
Me: He's okay, but he's really stressed.
Sirius, James, and Me: I wonder why. Hmm.
(thinking)
Sirius: OW!
Me: We can not afford to lose you Sirius. You're the only one that keeps this talk show up and running. Plus, I don't think I could stand being in a room alone with James. His glasses scare me.
James: 1. My glasses aren't scary.
2.What she means is, what's wrong, Padfoot.
Sirius: I think I just thunk.
Me& James: (groan)
Sirius: What?
Sirius: It's me in my jammies with Blankie when I was in 7th year.
Me: You named your blanket?
Sirius: Yup!
Me: You made it to 7th year!? I thought you were expelled for utter stupidity!
(Sirius& Me start bickering)
James: Ahem! While those two morons...
Sirius& Me: We're not morons. (me) He is. (Sirius) She is. (both) AM NOT! (start bickering)
James:... are bickering, I have an anouncement to make. Remus will be back on the next avatar. Thank you for your cooperation. (mouths) What those 2 don't have!
Remus: I'm back! (everyone claps)
Sirius: How don't get applause like that.
Me: (ignores Sirius) Let's give it up for Lily Evans/Potter.
James: (in mesmerized(sp?) voice) Llllllliiiiiilllllllyyyyy.
Remus, Sirius,& Me: (look at James concerned)
Me: Well, we gotta cut this short. We're concerned for James's health. OMG. He's making out with the lamp! (poor lamp)
Sirius: Yeah, yeah! Keep it up, Prongsie!
Remus: Okay, gotta go! NOW!
Remus: James won't be here for the next 2 avatars. He is currently in St.Mungo's Mentel Patient Ward. He is only temperally(sp?) insane. For now we commenting on the Bill Weasley avatar. Ash, any comments.
Me: Yeah, he looks like a girl. Now, where's Sirius.
Remus: Hey, I found a note.
To whom this may concern:
I'm taking a vacation. I do not get enough praise. Once I get that praise, I'll be right back.
Sincerely,
Sirius Black
Me: NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
Remus: For someone who constantly bickers with the guy, you're sure upset.
Me: Who am I gonna bicker with. I'm alone with Remus. Remus is BORING!
Remus: I resent that.
Sirius will be back. I can not tell u when, but the longest he'll be gone is for 3 avatars. Thank u for you're cooperation.
Remus: Let's give it up for Charlie Weasley. Wow 2 Weasleys in a row. What do u think, Ash.
Me:... *sigh*
Remus: *sweatdrop* She kinda went into a depression after Sirius left.
Me: I WANT MY PADDY BACK!!!!!! *sniff* (clutches stuffed black dog to chest)
Remus: (fixs his hair) (when I yell not even the fanciest hair can escape my wrath)
Me: *sob*
Remus: Oh, God. I hate it when girls cry. (pats my head)
(once I calmed down... a bit aka: a long while later, sorry I'm not wearing my watch)
Me: We appreciate(sp?) you Padfoot there I said it.
(Sirius appears out of nowhere)
Sirius: I'M BACK!!!!!
Remus: Yeah, you must have woken up the entire neighborhood.
Sirius: (ignores Remus) So, Ashley here says I'm appriciated(sp?).
Me: I had my fingers crossed.
Sirius: More than I can ever ask for.
Me: Padfoot, you don't realize how much I missed your radom comments that make absolutely(sp?) no sense whatsoever.
Sirius: Hey!
(me and Sirius start bickering)
Remus: Ahh, good times.
(angry neighbors with torches come back)
(me and Sirius are oblivious for we are engaged in a heated argument, I actually used big, smart words for once)
Remus: Uh, Guys...
Me& Sirius: WHAT!
Remus: Look outside.
Me& Sirius: (look outside)
Me: (groans) Not again. I might have to move out of state. That'll be hard.
Remus& Sirius: Why?
Me: I've been banned from 49 states.
Remus: Why am I not surprised?
Me& Sirius: Because you're smart.
Remus: Well, good ole PA is easy on u.
Me: I guess I'm gonna have to change my name. James'll find us.
~in everyone's mind~
(in a desert(that reminds me, I didn't have dessert yet) in the middle of nowhere)
James: (in croaky voice) Need food and water. (breathes out dramaticly(sp?))
(10 min. later)
James sad sees Lily in a mirage) (in old man voice) Lily. LILY! Lily, darling, (Voldemort appears, shudders, then disappears) it's me, James.
Lily mirage: (does a princess-like wave)
James: (runs up to Lily mirage, which happens to be a cactus, and starts making out with it.
(Harry appears out of nowhere)
Harry: Eww, I want good memories of my dad. I guess I'll have to put it in my 'bad memories of my dad' file. (opens head)
In Harry's head their is a little factory(don't ask)
Harry: Hey, Stevie?
(an elf that looks suspiciously(sp?) like Dobby comes out)
Stevie: Yes, Mr.Potter.(sounds like him, too)
Harry: Could You put that in the 'bad memories of my dad' file.
Stevie: Yes, Mr. Potter. (approaches the biggest file that has, 'do not open, contains disturbing images' written all over it, and puts it in.
Harry: Thanks. (screws head back on then disappears)
~end of that... thing~
Everyone: (shudder)
Me: Nevermind....
Me: Okay, James is back, so I put a picture of Lily in the Hogwarts School uniform in hopes of getting him sent to St.Mungos again.
Remus& Sirius: That's mean.
Me: (cackles evilly) I know.
James: Llllllllliiiiiiiillllllllllyyyyyyyyyy.
Me: It's working.
(Voldemort appears out of nowhere and looks at James)
Voldemort: He has finally driven himself insane. MMMMMMWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHAAAAAAA*cough cough* Water*cough* Need wawa.
Me: Oh, why didn't you ask. (pulls out Wawa sub)
Voldemort: Not that kind.
James: (looks at Voldemort) .... LILY!
Voldemort: I-I'm n-n-no-ot L-li-ly.
James: (hugs Voldemort who falls into a sink full of water)
Voldemort: (DIES!)
Me: God, who would think that's how he would die.
Remus: Are you kidding me. The best way to destroy an evil, almost invincable(sp?) Dark Lord is drowning them in the sink when you think they're your dead wife.
Me: Okay.
Sirius: Don't you think that's a bit random.
Me: Yeah...
PS: Don't worry James will be good as new by the next avatar.
Me: Give it up for.... Percy Weasley.
Sirius: Woot!
Remus: What is it with JKR and red heads?
James: I dunno. But I sure do like red heads. Maybe I should date Mrs.Weasley.
Remus: She's married.
James: Oh, yeah...
Sirius: That wouldn't stop me, but I don't like Molly all that much.
What do you think, Moomy?
Remus: Did you just call me Moomy?
Sirius: Yup!
Remus: No comment.
Sirius: Come on!
Remus: Padfoot?
Sirius: Yeah...
James, Remus,& Me: SHUT UP!
Me: Okay, here's Nymphadora Tonks. I never really liked pink spiky hair, so I changed it to this. I mean she can change it anyway.
Sirius: Is that my cousin?
James: No, it's the other Nymphadora Tonks in the Harry Potter series.
Sirius: There's another one!?
Me& James: (hit heads with 'Hogwarts: A History')
...
Me: Have either of you noticed Remus hasn't said a word since this started.
James, Sirius,& Me: (look at Remus)
Remus: (stares at Tonks avatar, drooling)
Sirius: It's the acopolus(sp?).
James, Sirius,& Me: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! (run around like chickens with their heads chopped off)
Remus: (snaps out of it) Am I the only sane one around here?
Me: Wow, it's been 4everrrrrrrrr since I last updated this thing.
Sirius: Yeah, I bet they missed me.
Me: Ahem. What about me?
Sirius: Ur 1 of the downsides of doing this show.
(start bickering)
James: I missed our time off...
Remus: Ditto. Anyway we should do the introduction.
James: We didn't already?
Remus: Arrggh.
James: Cool, u sound like a pirate.
Remus: Okay, let's make the introduction the ending.
This is Alicia Spinnet. Goodbye.
(me n Siri stop bickering)
Me, James and Sirius: But....
Remus: GOODBYE!!!!!
Me: Give it up 4 Angelina Johnson.
....
Me: Ahem.
Sirius, James, and Remus: Hunh?
Me: SAY SOMETHING!
Sirius: Something.
Me: Agghh.
(pulls hair out)
James and Sirius: Ha! Ur bald!
Me: (hair magically grows back) No, I'm not!
Remus: How'd ya do that?
Me: We're at the mercy of mmy keyboard.
...
Loud, magical voice: MMMMWWWWWWAAAAHHHAAAHHHAA!!!!
(Voldemort appears out of nowhere)
Voldemort: I like my evil laugh better.
(disappears)
Remus: I thought James killed him!
James: I killed Voldemort?!
SWEET!
Sirius: Apperently not...
James: Aww, MAN!
I wanted to kill him.
Remus and Sirius: Don't worry James.
Me: You'll get him later.
James: Really!?
Me: NO!
...
(to be continued)
Me: Okay, this is Fluer Delacour.
James: Cool, that rhymes.
Sirius: What he said.
...
Sirius: Her names Floor?
Me, James, and Remus: FLUER!
Sirius: Russian?
James: FRENCH!
Sirius: Okay, okay.
...
Remus: I still don't understand.
Me: Understand what?
Remus: How u think this stuff up.
Me: I'm gifted!
Sirius & James: Cursed.
Me: Hey!
Remus: I guess that's how people randomly appear and disappear.
Me: Well, duh. What do u think this is? A science fiction?
Remus: I guess not?
Me: Then, live with it.
Me: Drum roll!
*silence*
Me: DRUMROLL!
Drum roll guy: (sleeping) Rosie, I'm home.... No more cookies Lucy.
Remus: Just forget him.
Me: (ignores Remus and pulls out patheticly fake wand) AVADA KADAVRA!
(doesn't work)
Me: Damn.
Sirius: Save it 4 the cameras.
Me: SHUT UP!
Remus: Please don't bicker)
Me and Sirius: (ignore Remus and bicker)
Remus: (to James) Does anyone ever listen to me.
James: Hunh?
Remus: Nevermind...
(that's Albus Dumbledore by the way)
Me: Eww.
James and Sirius: GREASY GIT!
Remus: Severus Snape?
Me: Ew-er. He looks so... so.... GREASY!
James and Sirius: U better believe it.
Remus: He's not that bad.
Everyone besides Remus: (look horrified)
...
Me: He's been corrupted.
Sirius: CPR! (gives Remus CPR)
Me: Is it me or is he enjoying that to much?
James: Which one?
Me: Both.
James: It's not just u.
Me and James: (look at each other) EWW!
...
(Sorry 4 the slash. I know it's gross. Remember Remus and Sirius r both STRAIT! Sorry 4 any misunderstandings)
Me: Yay! Cedric!
Sirius: He's dead.
Remus: Must u be so blunt.
James: This is Padfoot, Remus. After 7 yrs. of sharing a dorm with him, u mean to tell me u forgot that his middle name is blunt.
Remus: Oh, yeah...
Sirius: My middle name is Orion.
James: God bless him...
Remus: He knows his middle name.
Sirius: Well, duh. Who doesn't know their middle name?
Me: *cough*
...
Me: It'd be funny if it were Sirius Lee Black. Get it! Sirius Lee= Seriously! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
(crickets chirp)
Me: Apparently, nobody here has a sense of humor.
Sirius: Or ur just not funny.
Me: Hey!
Me: Victor Krum. (unenthusiastic(sp?) voice) Woooooooooooo.
(Ron appears)
Ron: U wanna piece of me Vicky?
(slips on the wet floor, is knocked out, and disappears)
James: That was random.
Remus: Yeah.
Sirius: But it happens all the time.
Me, James, and Remus: True.
...
Me: It's a miracle. Sirius is right for once.
Sirius: I have my moments.
Me: Sirius when he was in prison.
Sirius: Now I'm all depressed.(wipes away fake tear)
Remus: Enough sarcasim Sirius.
Sirius: But I like sarcasm.
Remus: We know u do.
James: Translation- Shut the hell up Sirius.
Me: Lily Evans at the Yule Ball.
Sirius: But we didn't have a Yule Ball.
Me: Shut up!
Remus: Actually, we did.
Sirius: Really. Were was I?
Remus: Drunk in the Hospital Wing.
Sirius: So that's why Madam Pomfrey left and came back drunk as a skunk.
Me: (laughing hysterically)
...
James: OMG! Lily!
Me: Where the h*** have u been?
James: (runs into Lily avatar reapeatedly until passes out)
Remus: Oh God...
(James will be back after the next avi)
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