So, yeah.
I'm really ******** nervous right now. I just poured my heart out to some person I barely know, and probably ruined whatever friendship would have come from that.
Why is it that it's so easy to talk to someone you hardly know, and yet so hard to talk to someone you love with all your heart?
Perhaps it's because if a stranger rejects you, it's okay. You didn't know them anyway, right?
But if a loved one tells you the same thing, it's painful.
Or maybe I just need to suck it up and do this.
Long story short, I'm nervous. I fear I'll fail again, because I haven't heard otherwise from anyone. I fear I'll end up hurting that someone, and I can't bear the thought of that.
I fear overextending myself, and losing my peace once again. I fear I'll lose my life in a city I hate with every fiber of my being.
But I'll press on. And if any of those fears comes true, I'll deal with it.
Because love is worth it. Nothing will stop me short of death from reaching this goal.
Just this once, I'd like to hold onto my chance at happiness.
And with that, I sleep.
Aetherwaves · Sun Feb 04, 2007 @ 08:00am · 3 Comments |