why? why does life get so hard when you grow up? why do friends change and become something else. i dont know whats happening to me. im feeling sad. and then im happy. as if i cant feel. im always smiling but lately its been getting harder. my life is kinda breaking up right now. but i have to push forward. i feel as if im stuck with darkness and its trying to hold me down. im trying really hard not to let others down but nothing seems to work. everytime i think of one friend my heart gets crushed. if i have one. everything thats happening in her life. what she's doing to herself. and the fact she wants to give up. i feel worthless. i cant do anything and it drives me crazy. i dont kno what to do. if i give up now....ill never be able to face my friends. but...will it be worth it?will my friends listen to me even if i dont give up? im failing miserably this. falling more like. in to darkness.
but i dont want to! one side of me is rebeling and the other side just says "give up. you cant do it. dont even try." i dont know anymore. now im acting like everyones my ******** pity party. whats up with me?!
[Muse of Immortality] · Thu Mar 29, 2007 @ 11:54pm · 1 Comments |