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Ninhjas watching joo...
dad, sometimes i just wish.
i wish you knew me.
not knowing what i like to eat, what i like to drink, what clothes i prefer over others..
i mean like, knowing who i really am.
what i feel inside as a human being.
what i think, and what i do.
you always seem like your right, you always seem i am the kid you think i am.
you think i don't cry when things are said to me hurtfully, or i don't get frustrated when too many things are on the go.
you just assume that it's not me.
well it is.

you believe that i'm dumb as a doorknob, you don't see my accomplishments nor my goals i have set for myself.
you just see the fails that i have made in the past and my faults.
just because you ask me how school was, doesn't make you the best parent out of the bunch, obviously, i say.. "oh it went okay." then you respond with a "ohh, i see." or "that's nice.."
the reason why i don't tell you the exact thing that happened at school is because you don't wanna know or you could simply just give a rats-a**.
and you just proved it by not digging deeper into the question.
your just covering it up then throwing it away into the storage.
and guess what, there's over forty-thousand of those.
so, i'm guessing you could care less?

it's funny how my friends come over or we go to the parent-teacher interviews and you make me seem the world's bestest daughter that God has given you.
but the minute you step out of your fantasy stage, you make me feel like a piece of dirt; worth nothing.
yeah, dad. you make me feel like this.
and it's ironic how low self-esteem happens at school, with kids and the teachers. never your own parent.
i think he just never became the bully at his school.
just decided to throw it all on me.. 13 years later.

i understand that you once had a daughter and she got taken away from you.
with reasons i don't know.
the mother was a b***h.
i get it, but i'm your daughter now.
i don't wanna hear this bull-s**t about my half sister.
if you honestly love her that much, go and find her.
the hell with me.
then you can make up 34 years lost.
sound good?

maybe your just letting your anger out on thee worst daughter ever.
because i'm not smart enough, i'm mentally challenged according to you, i can't think for myself, what i say is bullshit or lies.
but i'm all that and not.
just because you couldn't have your first daughter; the perfect one.
doesn't mean you shouldn't give love to the other imperfect daughter.
and make her feel even more worthless then what she already is.

after 13 years, i still feel like your not my dad.
dad's make you feel good about yourself more then you already are.
not push you down even more into the s**t you'll already in.

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