This is....a response of sorts. Read on and you will see what I mean. The meaning to this, and all of that. My way of having the last word. Or, My way of thanking someone.
Anyways. Here goes. I was recently in a relationship of sorts. It was very intense, and had quite a few emotionally charged moments in it. However, there were inequities that were glaringly obvious, throughout the four days or so that this spanned. It reminds me of "We lived, We Laughed, We held on fast, and then we said goodbye." I don't know if she is serious about cutting herself off of internet and everything....and honestly, I don't care. I've pulled the switch. Something I have noticed I can do, and once that happens, I don't care if you live or you die. Whether or not you breathe at that point makes no nevermind to me. She was/is a wonderful person, when she allowed herself to believe she was. Enormously talented, and smart. But she was, like most humans, prone to flogging herself, having much to do with inadequate parents, or stunningly stupid tormentors, or what not beating her or anyone with those problems in to their own submissive state of self hatred. She has more or less cut herself off from me. She said she wanted to make herself better, to "master" herself. Granted, this is great in theory, but I do not believe that it is a possible thing. Personally, I do not know for sure what the true reasoning is, and again, I don't really care. But it did provoke my own thought. I have spent a fair amount of time beating myself up. It is stupid and it is wrong. I have came to a realization, by her more or less pushing me away. Strange as it seems, but that realization is, That I am awesome. I am everything I have quested to be in most areas, and if I am not, I soon will be. With 22 minutes elapsed in the new year, I realize that this new year and new decade will bring new challenges and new people. As it has been said..."Many have tried to lay siege to my kingdom....and one by one, they all suffered the same fate." Truer words were never spoken. I look forward to the challenges. It is time I got back to "YOU WANT SOME, COME GET SOME!" attitude, and then make it better. I, like those who are with me, have not the luxury for grief, nor can we stay snot nosed kids forever. So. If you are with me, then be with me. If not, then stay the hell out of my way. From here on in, things get done my way. And we will see what the future holds.
View User's Journal
Random Things.
This is the place for cool stuff. XD
|
 |
||||||||||||||||||
