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Boys Scare Me >.<


Jooombiiine
Community Member
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Is it a Sheltered Life?
Maybe I'm being a chicken or over dramatic. I don't know.

So, growing up, I was always told I wasn't allowed to date.

In elementary school, I didn't care so I had like, 10 boyfriends. If you were mean to me, it was over.

In middle school I gave in to peer pressure and I didn't know how to say no (didn't want to hurt feelings). I had like 5 boyfriends which is way better than elem.

Two guys liked me and I was already dating one. The second guy asked me over facebook and I didn't want to hurt his feelings, so I said yes! I was so dumb.

They both hated me and I hurt their feelings. That was the WORST experience of my life. Smh

I cried, hard, the next day. After that, I started saying no.

I think I had one more. He was in my band class (not a band nerd stare ) and he was really nice.

We dated for a few months and then people started saying it was weird that we haven't kissed! I thought kissing was gross, I'm not gonna lie.

I broke up with him, though. I can't remember why. He was really sad.

I had one boyfriend in High School.

I'd say he was my real boyfriend because I said yes because I wanted to.

We had drama class together and a lot of flirting went on.

He's spanish and he had such a sexy voice! Sometimes he would speak to me in spanish- thinking about it gets me riled up, lol

But he was only my bf because he moved, my mom was more comfortable with that.

We kissed once. It was a long distance relationship.

At the time, I was going through a lot of crap with my dad and we basically had no relationship, so my tolerance for guys was a straight 0.

I told him I wanted to be friends, he was pretty upset, then some misunderstandings went down and he hates my guts.

I NEVER wanted to hurt him! I was still growing and learning, so I don't feel bad, I just wish he would stop hating me.

He is such a great guy...with a sexy voice, lol

I've kissed one other guy, a black dude.

I was really nervous and unsure, but I decided to be bold.

He wanted me to give him a bl*wjob, but like stare really? We've made out three times! Besides, he flirted with other girls! I wasn't going to do something like that for no reason- idk.

Anyway, I was scared. I've never even seen one before!

He pulled it out, I squeezed my eyes shut, he let me touch it, then I ran.

I couldn't do it.

Sigh...so, and I being a chicken? I just feel like, when you do that stuff with someone, there has to be some type of feeling or...something! Idk

I can flirt, talk smack, and I have a vivid imagination (especially after today) but my experience with other stuff is very limited.

Is that a bad thing?

I feel like, maybe it is, but maybe it's not? I'm not sure...




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