My brother wrote this and insisted I post it. Don't blame me for it.
'I regret to inform my dear reader that with the draft of this missive I have become aware of a simple but nonetheless pressing realisation; this being that X is indeed an utter douche.
Yet to call our good friend X a ‘douche’ would be a grievous disservice to the institutions of female hygiene. Indeed! The repulsive name, and of course, the wretch behind it, all effect such similar nominal inaptitude with comparison, irregardless of how unfavourable the object of comparison may be. Perhaps the name ‘X’ could one day form the crux of a truly terrible insult, this verbal abuse resulting in the utmost offence and humiliation to anyone thusly dishonoured.
But enough about name-calling! It is noted by this one that our good friend is often inclined to dispense some joke or quip for our amusement, only to have such things fall flat on apparently unaccommodating ears, and thus engender a response more than short of jovial laughter on our part. I sincerely apologise for this most abhorrent transgression! When pondering as to why this seems to occur and reoccur with such frightening constancy, no thoughts of mind yield any reasonable explication. I am most sorry! However, according to our esteemed companion, this is due to our lack of any real sense of humour. While I am thankful for the suggestion, which helps to fill the admittedly chasmal void in my reasoning, I believe things to be different. It is my opinion that we are simply yet to embrace the more modern, abstract forms of comedy. For example, I am certainly uninformed when it comes to ‘s**t’ comedy, which our kind friend seems to have mastered in and out, not to mention through and through.'
Brian Topp Community Member |
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