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My Sweet Lullaby
Tonight you can sleep
A long an dreamless sleep
Just relax,sit back, hold tight
Everything is gonna be alright
Don't worry about those monsters
Cause they won't get you here,
Not while im beside you,
Not while im near
Cause baby, your my fascination
I won't let a soul get past me
Your my love that needs protectin'
from all the harm an misery
So cheer up and smile
Don't be afraid or cry
Just listen, try to listen
To this sweet lullaby
I've never felt this way
About someone such as you
an these feelings you think are false
Are actually really true
That's why I wear my heart
Right here upon my sleeve
To give to someone such as yourself
Your a dream I won't decieve
So tonight im coming,
with a promise I won't break,
That ill always be here beside you,
In the morning when you wake
You won't have to worry
Cause I won't dissapear
Ill always be beside you
Ill always be right here
Cause baby, your my fascination
I won't let a soul get past me
Your my love that needs protectin'
from all the harm an misery
So cheer up and smile
Don't be afraid or cry
Just listen, try to listen
To this sweet lullaby
You'll make it in this world
Have faith and you'll see,
lifes what you make it,
What you want it to be
So get up off your seat
This plan I've got is neat
Baby, you don't have to be afraid
Its an adventure, our on cascade
Come on, we'll take it together
For now,always, and forever
So tonight you'll see the best of me
In your thoughts an in your dreams
I promise I won't be a dissapointment
So please don't be obscene
To make it official
I wear my heart upon my sleeve
So take it, its yours
Rip it from its seams
Hold onto it tight,
Cause it'll make everything alright
So you see love, its fine
I won't feed you pity lines
cause your my other half
my soulmate at heart
I won't leave you alone,
here in the dark.
So don't be afraid
Oh god baby, don't cry
just relax and listen
to this sweet lullaby
When your alone
and feeling sad
Just remember im always here
Right beside you
Whispering in your ear
Ill never leave you,
Hurt or deceive you
Black your eyes
With my selfish pride
Ill only give you kisses,
hugs when you weep,
and at night when your tired,
Ill sing you too sleep.
You won't have to worry,
won't have to be afraid
Cause this is our adventure
Our own cascade
I won't let you down,
or dissapear out of town,
so cheer up sweet pea
Its love we have, you see
Its not imagination
This isn't just a dream
its all real, not surreal
So come on, just trust me
Cause tonight I wear my heart
right here upon my sleeve
I give it to you as a token
for you are my destiny
that's right, its true
baby its just me an you
So hush your mouth
don't worry..
I won't say goodbye
Be quiet an let me sing to you,
My sweet Lullaby.
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This is what our world is becoming.
What is our world becoming?
Parents become enemies.
Children run away,
Young girls become prostitutes
Struggling teens turn to drugs.
Are schools are over run with snobby kids, that think their better than all of us.
They put others down cause they think it makes them look good.
People are getting murdered left an right.
Children are beatin.
Some teens suffer with the desire to commit suicide.
Some with depression
Others suffer with the lack to socialize because of whatever reason(like jerks that always put others down)
So what is our world becoming?
Siblings fight; hate eachother
Young teens turn to alcohol
Others choose to get high
Little Suzy Blue never knew
How fast her life could past by
She was only 15
Turned to drugs in the street
Got some friends involded
So what is our world becoming,
While we break all the laws?
Highschool girls getting pregnant,
Rate of ages getting younger each year
Making parents an guardians
Face their worst fears
Is this what our world is becoming?
Young voices are beginning to rise,
Trying to be heard
Being ignored,
Its obsurd.
But will it change?
Its time for a change.
Its time to be heard,
time to be seen,
time to be recognized
as the ones who spoke out,
the ones who can make a difference,
save a life, be a hero.
This is what our world is becoming.
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Thats Life.
I was just laying here on my bed an thought about my mom and how im never going to get to see her again,touch her,hold her,hug her,tell her I love her,hear her voice, or tell her im sorry for not spending much time with her. And now I find myself crying, because I wish I would have done all those things more,and spent more time with her.. Now its too late. She's already gone, and I regret never spending time with her, and I regret those times that I probally said I hated her, and that time I went all physcho an her and my sister an stabbed a butterknife into the door an told them both I hate them.. That look on her face is burned into my mind.. I feel terrible.. An I can only imagine how my sister must feel about it.. I wonder if she even remembers it.. I hope she doesn't. I wish I didn't remember it.
I regret throwing fits because my mom wanted me to spend time with her instead of letting me go to my friends house. I regret not fixing her a sandwich when she asked for one cause I didn't feel like it when I knew good and well that she would have to risk her life to go fix herself a sandwich cause I wouldn't do it. She did that often after she eventualy gave up on getting me to do it. She would take her ventalator breathing tube out of her neck, causing her not to be able to breath for those 1 or 2 minutes it took her to fix herself a sandwich.
I regret not staying with her the day before she died when she asked me too, when im positive she knew she was going to die the next day, that it was her time to go. All she wanted was me to spend one last day with her, but I was so selfish I couldn't even do that, I had to throw a big fit an beg her to let me go back to my friends house, when I had been over there already for 2 weeks straight and came back that day just to ask if I could stay again. If I only knew.. I would have stayed. I would have hugged her,told her I love her more than anything in the world. I would have told her id miss her soo much. Id tell her everything and id say im sorry for not spending more with her an that im sorry for being a selfish, hard-headed little girl. I would have told her so many things, but now those things will only remain as words left unsaid.
The doctors told us she would die eventualy. But I had it in my head that, that day would never come and I moved on with my life and didn't think about it. Then it happened, I had no idea what to do, didn't know what was real anymore. I mean I was only 12, what was I supposed to do? What was I supposed to think? "Its my fault" that was what went through my head when I found out, and still today it sometimes does. Even though I know nothing I done could have caused her to die but I feel like if I would of showed her how much I care she would have fought to stay alive longer.. But I didn't. Didn't even attempt it. And that right there...is my biggest regret.
So learn from my mistake. Don't take your parents or your siblings or anyone else in your family for granted. Cause in the end your family is all you have left. Whether they be alive or dead, their there, an their listening.
Im sure a lot of the times you say "I hate my dad" or mom or sister or brother or whoever. But ask yourself this "do I really?".
All those times you wished they were dead, is that what you really wanted? Is it what you want now? I wish it upon my dad a lot but I don't realy think I mean it, I think I just strongly dislike him sometimes, and Im sure I probally wished that upon my mom a few times too,and im sure I didn't really mean it, I mean, I don't mean it now, I don't want her dead, but she is and that's life. People die, you cry and morn over them for a while then you move on. Isnt that how its supposed to be? Aren't you supposed to go on with your life and not waste it crying over someone who wouldn't want you to cry over them in the first place? Is it wrong? Or is it natural?
I guess the answer will come from your beliefs. If you believe its wrong then its wrong. If you believe its right then its right. But I believe its natural. Something you can't help but do. If someone you care about dies its instinct to cry over them and morn their death. Like hunger, its instinct to go get food when your hungry. its drilled into your brain, just like death. You know what it is, you don't like it, you don't want it to happen, but it does, and as I said before you cry, morn over the person for a bit, then you move on. That's life.
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Beyond The Meadow
Years and years go by
tears fall from the sky
and nothing changes
She walks in the meadows of a field
thinking,drinking, trying to feel
"Is this a dream", she asked herself mentally.
"I must be dead".
Touching the flowers as she goes by
she remembers why she came here
and once again her tears fall
Shes wearing a white dress
that flows in the wind as she walks gracefully
no shoes, just the feel of barefeet, peace
through the trees beyond the meadow
is her exit, her home
but she doesnt want to go there
she wants to stay here, walk
shes all alone in this beautiful place
not another person within a mile trace
yet she talks
shes empty, she cant feel
no matter how hard she trys
shes a container, no life
or thats how she feels, gone
in her stomache lies a mistake,
nine months from now it will come into the world
live a life she once lived, as a mistake
this new life will carry the memories
a pure reminder that 'he' saw her as nothing, a waste
She will tell this child nothing, mouth shut
It will never know what her parents failed to hide from her, she was a mistake
This child will not know its real father
will never know who that piece of trash was
this new life, this child, will live better
then 'he' could provide.
"I need to move on", she thought through all the rambling.
"I mustn't think about this, about him".
"I will carry on in the depths of this meadow", she concluded.
She is a peaceful girl, never ment for any of this to happen
but she has no control, she cant help who decides to come a long next
her only thoughts when she sees them is "Will he be just like the rest?"
Memories flood her thoughts
tears fall to the ground like acid rain
shes in pain, she cant take it
She rushes to the edge of the meadow, looks beyond the trees
she grabs her next bottle
takes a swig and drinks away its contents, her life
The meadow is no longer peaceful
it is a place of darkness, a nightmare
memories fill the once beautiful spaces of this place, this nature
She needs to leave, get out
she stumbles to the center of the meadow, falls
she cant make it to the other side, she cant walk
She lays there, staring at the sky, she has given up
lost with no hope, she doesnt care anymore, this life means nothing.
So drinks away the last bit of life she carried, no more worries
Darkness falls, eyelides closed, shes gone.
She is at peace.
FLutter, open, light.
Birds chirp, little animals run by her.
She smiles
She stands up, she walks, she looks
shes still in the meadow, how can this be? Shes dead.
It doesnt matter.
Shes happy now.
She walks around, letting the breeze lift her hair.
Touches the little white rabbits,
they all gather around her.
"Look beyond the meadow, child", says an unfamiliar voice.
Shes startled, she looks around, she sees nothing.
The voice repeats itself, "Look beyond the meadows, child."
She turns to face behind her.
White, light, bright.
"Shes beautiful, she must be an angel", she thought.
A woman steps into the meadow from the darkness of the forrest.
"Welcome, my child", the beautiful angel says.
She is beautiful, like a delicate flower.
She stands with pride, walks with grace.
Holds a promise
Her hair long and silky, flows with the wind
each step she takes sprouts a flower
She is pure.
She remembers how she ended up here, and she no longer regrets it.
"Stop child, you are not dead yet, you have another chance, a second chance,
if you would just take it, I beg you do. Tis not your time, my dear. Just look beyond the meadow,
you will see what awaits you", says this magnifcant creature, an angel.
The girl listens, turns, looks.
Shes sees her house, her father, her sister.
Loving carrying, not ready to let her go.
She makes her choice, she walks past the angel to the new opening of the trees.
and so she goes
Beyond the Meadow.
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