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I'm back again on this. I went out, had a good talk and people watching, ate decent food and walked some more. I tried on hats, which finally fit again, and looked at things my lady might like or be interested in. We watched a movie and ate pretzels and drank blue raspberry lemonade.

Now here's what went wrong:
She didn't like the hats I tried and gave me ones I didn't like, didn't like the sexy garments I showed her or would have liked for her. The film wasn't funny enough and when I tried to do a few nice things for her they came to naught. I just want things to be simpler, who can promise that?

Today was so wonderful until I left the beach and loneliness set in. Everything continually went wrong and I cried in a public place. That is no way to live, and that is no way to control my emotions. I'm going to need a solution and quick, because I can't keep breaking down like this...I'm tough but I'm stretched thin, and I don't have anyone who can carry my weight.

tektek.org

Why can no one understand the world the way i do?
Why can no one see the change
I feel from me, to you?
Can no one see that how i feel doesn't fit on some straight plan?
That sometimes i can't help but say i don't know where i am?
That i don' know where i'm going, and i've forgotten where i've gone?
And that it's quite hard to continue, to carry on?

Why must i be pushed to do what i say i won't?
Like people don't understand that i don't
want to live like a puppet, on someone else's string,
to listen to their every whim, and do most anything.
Some people just don't get the fact that my thoughts are just my own
And their opinion is just an endless drone...
A distraction, a curse, that i must listen to or craze,
Why can't they not see that they must grow out of this phase.

I wish that i could show them just what freedom is,
and show them, in my own life, what it is...to live.....

NO SCHOOL TODAY, due to typhoon....how tyght is that? Aw man, that is so great....now i don' have to walk around all day, limping on my pulled/torn-muscle leg.....ain't it great?? Yeah, and now i prolly get to talk to all o my good friends.....WOOHOOOO.......this post was just for the joy of the occasion......YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!