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Secrets


skitzophrenicXteddybear
Community Member
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What the hell is the point of a journal? All I'm doing is talking to myself. No one's ever interested in my journals. My friends don't read them, nor does anyone else from the public....
I accidentally cause self-inflicted emotional pain. I blame things on others... but maybe some of those things I blame on them really are their faults.
I'm also having issues with my boyfriend lately... we haven't been seeing eye-to-eye. I worry about losing him... I worry about making him so angry with me that he leaves me even though it tears him apart.
I feel like I take him for granted, but I don't want to, nor try to. I certainly hope I'm not....
Is this point in the month a bad week for everyone else too? I mean, my gaian friends are having problems too.... I don't understand.
Why is the world so cruel? Why can't people accept each other? Why can't ALL of my friends accept ANY of my boyfriends? ... To them there's always something wrong. ALWAYS. He's never good enough for them... never.
I hate being bitched at, and that's what happens to me. I get bitched at by my friends and others who don't even know me. I feel used... so used.
I live to please others, as I think of it. I think that if I live to please others, than my life will be fine. Without enemy. Full of friends. Wouldn't that be the life of a geisha?
I am japanese... maybe if that's how it is... maybe that's how I was meant to be.





 
 
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