|
Funny Red vs Blue Quotes!!! |
|
|
|
|
|
|
*Church/Caboose are shooting back and forth with Simmons/Grif/Donut* Simmons:Um... I need to leave. Grif: Ya, me too, Wars Hell I need to go home. Simmons: Nonono seriously, i need to go to a conference, back on Earth. Donut: Say what? Grif: A conference? I don't think so nancy, maybe you didn't notice but, we're in the middle of a war here. What kind of conference is gunna get you out of that? Simmons: It's the microsoft PDC. *Grif stops shooting, looks at Simmons and puts his gun down* Grif: Donut cease fire, we need to get Simmons outta here. Simmons: I really have to go, they only hold these things once every few years. Donut: What are you talking about? You think the blues are gunna stop fighting just because microsoft says so? *Church and Caboose stop firing* Church whispering: What was that? Caboose whispering: I think they said something about Microsoft. Church: Hey reds! We're coming out! Donut What the hell is going on here? Simmons: Sorry guys sorry sorry. I really thought we'd be done fighting by the time I had to catch the transport out of here. Church: Ah nah, it's cool we understand. We were almost out of ammo anyway. Donut: Son of a *&%#$! I knew it! This sucks! How can a software company stop a war? Grif: It's called priorities Donut. Donut: Can't anyone do anything about this? *Grif and Church look at each other* Grif/Church: *Burst out laughing*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tex- I just need a better weapon Tucker- Do you want me to help you find one? Tex- Hmm... you could just give me your sword Tucker- No way! I can see through your ploy, you just want me to give you the sword Tex- But that's what I just said! Tucker- Yes, but it's the way you said it Tex- It's a good thing that that sword doesn't run on brain power... OMG TUCKER! LOOK! HOT CHICKS! Tucker- Nice try, you just want me to turn around and knock me out and take away the sword Tex- Now the hot girls are making out! Tucker-Ok, that's worth the risk (turns around) Oh crap (Tex hits him from behind and takes the sword)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Simmons- Hey Grif- Yeah? Simmons- You ever wonder why we're here? Grif- It's one of life's great mysteries, isn't it? Why are we here? Are we the product of some cosmic coincidence, or is there really a god, watching everything, with a plan for us and stuff. I don't know man, but it keeps me up at night. Simmons- (looks blankely at him) What?! I mean, why are we out here, in this canyon? Grif- Oh, um... Yeah. Simmons- What was all that stuff about God? Grif- Oh, nothing. Simmons- Do you want to talk about it? Grif- No Simmons- You sure? Grif- Yeah
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tex: Ya, he's got some help too, one of those religious nuts you guys picked up. Caboose: Oh! I liked them...they were funny. Tucker: Caboose, they tried to kill you because of a FLAG! Caboose: *sigh* I tend to forget the bad things about people. Tucker: Thats ALL they did Caboose. Caboose: It's ok, I have a very short memory-WOW LOOK A BEACH!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
O'Mally: Muha ha ha ha-Oh for God's sake! Will you hurry up?! Lopez! I'm dissapointed in your work. These minions are MUCH too slow! Lopez: I think they are moving along nicely. O'Mally: You fool! You don't even have legs, and you STILL got up here faster than them!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sarge: I think their distracted, lets use this chance to slip away! Simmons: Great idea sir! I have a lock on that distress signal, we could head right for it! Sarge: Good thinking Simmons, everybody in the Jeep. *Everyone jumps into the jeep* Simmons: Shotgun! Grif: Shotgun, ********! Donut: Shotgun's Lap! Simmons: ********!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Church: Since i'm the least visible, i'll go and spy on the reds Caboose: Great, i'll come with u Church: That kinda defeats the purpose caboose. Caboose: ....ok....wat if i'm really, really ....quiet. Church: Caboose, do u even know wat the term visibility means? Caboose: ahaha, aha, that's a good one church... Church: Seriously...u don't do u? Caboose: ....no
Sarge (getting possesd by church): herrrgheur! Grif: sarge? are u alright? Sarge: uh, who u talking to red? me? Grif: no, i'm talking to lopez (who is a mute robot) cos, u know, THAT's real helpful. Sarge: oh, i'm just uh....worried about these goddamn blues! makes me so goddamn mad i could spit! KEEE-PUUT! Grif: umm...sarge, did u just spit inside ur own helmet? sarge: yeah i guess i did grif: permission to speak freely sarge: sure grif: that's really f***ing gross. Later, after sarge is unpossesed sarge: wat the, wat am i doing here, i....who spat on my visor?
l Black Rock Shooter l · Tue Jan 08, 2008 @ 05:15am · 1 Comments |
|
|
|
|
|