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Ground Zero.. Again :: Can You Hear The Raven's Call? |
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Stares at the clock as the time goes by and sighs " What Do i Have to do to make this last"
Well.. it happened again, Once more i have had my heart "broken" by the same person, She told me that this time she had "jumped the gun" and went into this head first without really thinking about it, and she said she needs time to get over the loss of her last boyfriend whom she loved a lot.
But you know this time it didn't really phase me... I understand that she needs time and you know Maybe I'm starting to become numb to that pain, or maybe its because i know that sometime in the future there may be time for another chance, i don't know, but i guess we will have to wait and see what happens .
All i know is that i love her, and if its time that she needs then I'll give it to her. I don't think that the feelings i have for her will ever go away, i mean we have dated in total 5 times and which is about 3 years of our lives, and during that time shes broken my heart a few times and yet every single time she does i seem to be able to look at her with the same eyes, and feel the same way about her... and i Crazy? or just Crazy for her... I'll leave that up for you people to decide.
I'm really thankful that we are such close friends too, it helps me to know that no matter what I'll always have a chance with her, and that, come hell or high water we will always be the greatest friends, it also helps that her parents really like me as well.
My fears right now are of those thoughts that pass in my mind now and then, things that i know i could never do.. I've made promises to people against them.. and yes they are the ever annoying Suicide thoughts, i know its dumb and that i will never even do it for the simple fact that i have a reason to live.. and that reason is her. 3nodding In more ways then one... My only other fear is that events will play out and World War Three will happen at her house.. in which in any case will lead to massive problems, chances are if it happens the way i think it might, shes going to end up moving in with me sooner then expected, not that its a bad thing but i would hate to see her be forced out.
Never the less even with my fears and whatnot, i guess i'll just have to keep looking forward, and hope for the best.. that and keep praying to my Lord and Lsdy and wishing for things to come out in a positive way for the both of us..
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"He handed her 12 roses, 11 real and one fake. Then he told her he'd love her until the last one died."
I want to be the guy holding you while you fall asleep in my arms, not worrying about anything else in the world. I do so very much. <sigh>
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Any of you that do "pray" to a deity or multiple deities, please keep me in your prayers and for those whom don't, Just send you "best wishes".
Oh and if anyone didn't get whom i was talking about.. "Her" is Dwayna DragonFire.
Well.. what else is there to say.. <sigh> nothing really as of right now.. i guess its time for that new famous line....
Lastly i would like to say that Sara.. I love you so much, and will always love you know matter what. ninja heart heart
This is Raven Dragonfire for Channel 13 News Signing off...
 Raven DragonFire · Tue Jun 12, 2007 @ 08:46pm · 0 Comments |
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