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There wasn’t an hour in the day that he didn’t cross her mind. She would often find herself completely unable to stop thinking about him and the thousands of small brown ringlets that spilled out of the top of his head. His hair was like a riot of brown swirls, fleeing from his head as if incapable of hearing his thoughts, which were always fascinating and wonderful, anymore. Even the thought of the few small hairs on his chin refused to be replaced. But the thoughts that occupied most of her thoughts of him were his eyes.
She could be lost for hours on end, drowning in the magnificent brown seas that were his eyes. It wasn’t so much the outward appearance of them that captivated her so, it was more the feeling that took over her mind, body, and soul when she dared to look a little deeper. They were always so warm and caring and loving and accepting to everything they took in. She never felt as wanted or loved as she did when she was blessed with the privilege of looking into his eyes, the windows to his soul.
When they were together, life was almost perfect. Being able to be close to him was all she ever wanted, all she ever craved. And yet, sometimes, or rather most times, there was another thought in her mind that was impossible to battle away. It not only presented itself when he was nestled comfortably in her arms, but even when she was alone and her thoughts drifted to his bright and shining face. The horrible thought that she would never be good enough for him. He was just so amazing and understanding, she would never be worthy of his companionship.


She never felt better then when she first let those three little words slip from her lips, though saying them was one of the scariest experiences of her life. This whole ‘Love’ thing was wonderful and terrifying all at the same time, and oh, so confusing! She wanted so much to bring him closer, to let him know exactly how her mind worked, but she found the thought absolutely horrifying. What if, when he found out what her darkest sides were really like, he stopped loving her? What if he even started hating her for her thoughts? Letting him any closer, for now, was definitely out of the question. The thought of him being disappointed in her made her want to curl up in a ball and cry. She would never be able to handle the thought of his happy face becoming angered or saddened because of something she did. She would have rather been tortured endlessly then to hurt him or cause him any sort of emotional distress.


Her thoughts of him were always pure, never tainted or unloving. They were her very favorite thoughts. Whether it was reminiscing of something they had done, or just imagining their future together, she Loved nothing more then to think about him. The only time there was any sort of sadness was when she thought of him, was when her mind forced her mind forced her to consider the thought of him breaking up with her, it was never the other way around. She truly hated those thoughts, with severe passion. They always made her cry, or at least gave her the impulse to do so. These thoughts made her want to keep him at a distance, they mad it crucial, necessary. She hated herself for feeling that way, truly hated herself. He thought that they were so close; when there was really so much more to her then she let anyone in the world see. She was sure there were sides to her that even she had forgotten about; she had suppressed them for so long.
She wasn’t sure if she wanted to ever show him all of her sides, as there were sides of her that even she couldn’t stand. She felt that if he got any closer to her then he was that he would be way to close to her for her comfort. He could already hurt her so much, and he didn’t even know it. Sure, she had given him an idea of the extent in the amount of pain he could cause, but he would never really understand. He could hurt her more then anyone has ever been hurt before in the history of the world, she was sure of it. But he wouldn’t. He said that he wouldn’t anyways. But she couldn’t help but wonder, sometimes, if his ex came back to him, if he would leave her. She wanted so much to ask him if her thoughts were right, but she couldn’t bring herself to ask. If he said ‘yes’ she would be devastated, if he said ‘no’ she wasn’t sure she would believe him anyways. So the thought would have to stay in her mind where it would hopefully die out.
But it refused to be smothered as abruptly as she had tried to. Toward the closing of the best day of her life, her mind began to drift and think its horrid thoughts. He, as observant and intuitive as he was, noticed her sadness and discomfort. At first she did her best to smile and tell him that everything was fine. He didn’t believe her, and she know it, but he let it drop anyways. After a few minutes of more thought, she finally asked him, “What if we see her?” He knew who she was talking about; he also knew how much she hated the topic of the other her, his ex her. “Well…I don’t know…but it’s nothing you need to worry about.” Silence.
She knew in her heart now that he wouldn’t hurt her, she knew that. She still found it hard to shake the thought. In a few months it was very possible that she would be face-to-face with her greatest fear, or would it be more accurate to say her worst enemy? The thought made her want to, quite literally, die. She hated the idea of being alone again. His companionship had come at the perfect time; a time when she felt unwanted and unloved.
After only a half an out of reassuring her that his feelings for her were genuine and deep, she felt better. Better then better. She felt perfect, completely perfect, even better then she had felt before. He always knew how to do that. He could cheer her up about anything and everything. When she had problems at home, or to much stress at school, he knew she could count on him to make it all ok.
She truly Loved him. Some would say that it was just a sort of ‘puppy love’ or, as Hemmingway would say, just a ‘boy and girl’ love. But she knew this was the real thing. This was Love in its truest and purest form.



There is a reason they have no names. This is a Hemmingway technique, try and guess why it is I chose to do it that way!! ^_^

wahmbulance wahmbulance CAUTION!! wahmbulance wahmbulance
Comments and critiques are welcomed, but I caution you, this peice is VERY personal to me. It shares my deepest more intimant fears and insecurities. BE CAREFUL! I might get a little snappy if you choose to be careless with your words.