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I often find myself pondering...

Why do obstacles often get thrown in my way when there are many other potential victims?
Why do I get punished for reasons unknown?
Why do little insults tend to pierce my heart?
Why do I get held up in my room, crying the night away?
Why is life just so down-right unkind?

I have acceptable answers to all those questions.
But knowing the answers to everything won't make the hurt go away, now will it?

Sometimes I find it hard to give my trust away...
Because I fear that doing so will only hurt me in the end.
Sometimes I find it hard to accept and treasure new-found friendships...
Because I fear that I'd lose the old ones.
Sometimes I find it hard to voice my problems and troubles...
Because I fear that once I open my mouth to speak, no one will listen.
Sometimes I find it hard to keep a smile on my face...
Because it isn't as easy as it used to be.

How does one get past all life's booby traps and man holes?
I don't know the answer to that one...

I am a teenager.
And just like most teenagers, I have to battle my own demons.

I have moodswings.
I take my anger out on the wrong people.
I have done many things that I regret doing.
I cry when no one is looking.

I am a teenager.
But unlike most teenagers, I have a Savior.

I will not cut myself.
I will not do drugs.
I will not drown myself in alcohol.
I will not commit suicide.

I'd grow old by the time I finish enumerating all my problems.
But at the end of the day, when the night is still and quiet and I am alone in my room,
I feel a presence.
The touch of God
The touch of my Savior

HE was tortured.
HE was humiliated.
HE was mercillessly nailed on a cross.
HE sacrificed HIS life.

For me...
And you

What did I do to deserve HIM?
I don't know the answer to that one as well but I do know that HE loves me...
HE loves you too.
Unconditionally

I remeber HIS great sacrifice.
I give in to HIS loving touch.
I allow myself to listen to what HE has to say.

And in a split second, all my troubles evaporate into thin air.

And then...
I smile.
I laugh.
I feel loved.

HE rids me of all my pain.
And then I feel it...

Bliss...

XOXO,
PaJiE (",//< wink ->