Grrrrrr........ i have nothing to do, i can see no one, i am so alone,every thing is going so wrong, some one tryed to break in the house last night and i know who the person was. i had the police here this morning and they think i'm lying my dad wont be working any more so my mom will be the only one working which means a really tight budget. s**t we cant even eat enough now only god know how things are gonna turn out. i have to get rid of some very valueble things to help out and when i get a job i have to pay rent for my room. how ******** up is that!!!!? i mean s**t we were doing just fine untill my ******** up father had gambling problems and now he is being verbaly and physicly abusive what the hell am i gonna do!? i have to get a job which i was planning on doing any way but now i have to get a job, take care of the house and animals for my mom, take care of my mom and dad. and squeeze in babysitting between all that., and still pay rent for a room i have slept in my whole life. scream *screams* i'm confussed i don't know what to do. i'm more lonely than ever because all my friends are some where cool, out of the house and i'm stuck here i haven't seen any body sence school got out. my boyfriend is leaving on the 11 of july to see his brother in indiana. so i can't talk to him for a month, he wont be back till August 12th. god i hate my life. people ask why i want to be older and they asume its because i want to drive a car and go out partying but the truth is i want to be older so i can have the life i never could have but only dream of. not being hit our yelled at by my dad. being able to go out side and read without having things thrown at me for not being in the house. sleeping when i want to. those kinds of things. i just want freedom. crying
my otherside · Tue Jun 28, 2005 @ 05:46am · 0 Comments |