I'm in love! I know I am! I'm sure of it!
But can you really be sure? After all, how can you say you are in love if you've never felt the emotion before?
I don't know how to explain, but it's like a burning in my chest, a craving to be with the person, an inability to sleep without hearing their voice. I feel pain when he feels pain. I'm happy when he is happy. All I want is his happiness above everything else. I want to be with him, to talk to him. I think about him all the time. He's always somewhere in my dreams. I see him smile and it makes me glad to see it, even if I know his smile isn't for me. I can tell when he is hurting when no one else can. I always know where he is and what he's doing, and if there is ever a time I don't know, I find out. He is my closest friend and my greatest enemy. My nightmare and my dream come true. My brother and my teacher. My protector and defender even when I'm not aware. He tells me everything and I tell him more. He confides in me what he can't tell any one else in the whole world and I do the same. He knows about me what I don't even know. He cares about me and is kind to me. I can laugh with him. I can cry with him. I can do stupid things and he will only laugh and say, "don't worry about it," or "you're so funny." I can talk to him the way I talk to myself and he will understand what I'm trying to say even when I some times don't. He will ask me for advise and give me his own without knowing it. He inspires me! He lifts my spirits. He makes me smile when I'm in the depths of despair. He is the one I want to hold. To hug and tell him "I love you." I want him to tell me that he loves me, to hold me and kiss my forehead and promise to always be there. I want to be the one he prays to marry. I want to be the one that makes him turn to his friends and say, "She's the one," when I walk by. I want to be the first one he looks for when he's lonely. I want to be the one always on his mind and in his dreams.
You are being selfish, dear.
I know! And I know that no matter what happens, I will never be the first one he runs to. I will always come in third. He will never see me the way I want him to. I won't ever see that sparkle in his eyes when he looks at me or talks about me that I always want to see. Of all the wishes in the world, there's nothing I could want more! And yet, it is the one thing that has absolutely no chance of ever happening.
And why not?
...because....
Because?
He's already in love...
Ouch... sad
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For you, my love
a collection of poems I've written to give to my special someone when I find him
plus a few things of my own ^_~
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